And that raised a question that had been troubling him ever since he’d seen her at the command center earlier today.
“What does this mission have to do with your getting back to the colony?”
Her bleak look said it all. “I made a deal with Lazaro Archer. I’ll assist the Order in any way I can to help get rid of Santino, and he’ll do whatever he can to convince my people to allow me to return home.”
The truth of her words belted him like a punch but he kept his face impassive. “That’s a long shot and you know it.”
“Yes, I know that. But it was the only hope I had.” She glanced past him to the dead bodies and the end of yet another lead on Santino. “You just took that hope away from me.”
Trygg tried to harden himself to the sadness in her eyes, the desperation. But it wasn’t easy to do. Not when the one thing he wanted was for her to stay. Not just in Rome, but with him. He should have told her that before now.
His chest felt hollow in the silence that stretched out between them. He ached with an emotion he could neither name nor reconcile.
He felt bereft as he watched her pivot on her sky-high heels and start marching away from him. He felt strangely empty and alone.
Fuck no.
This wouldn’t do. This hurt, this yearning.
This weakness where she was concerned.
He should be glad for her animosity toward him. He should be eager for the chance to see her gone from his city and his life.
He told himself he was.
He promised himself that since what Sia wanted most was to be rid of him and be free to go back to her own kind, he would do everything in his power to make that happen.
Chapter 11
“I thought I’d find you up here,” Phaedra said the next morning, joining Sia on the roof of the shelter house.
Her Atlantean friend had fashioned one area of the rooftop into a private garden space filled with large potted plants, blooming flower beds, citrus trees, and marble statuary. It was small, just five hundred square feet of tranquility, but it was a tiny slice of paradise, the closest thing to home that Sia had found anywhere else in the city.
She soaked in the peace and quiet, her arms spread out at her sides, her head tipped back to greet the newly risen sun. The cleansing rays poured into her, soothing and warm. This was a ritual for their kind, one required to rejuvenate both their bodies and souls.
Today, Sia needed healing on every level possible, most especially her heart.
Phaedra offered a concerned smile. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m fine. Much better today.” It was mostly a lie, but she was tired of feeling sorry for herself. She had plenty of time for that when she was alone. “It’s beautiful up here.”
Phaedra inclined her head at the praise. “This is the only space in the house that’s off-limits for the other residents. Sometimes I feel guilty for not sharing it.”
Sia smiled. “Thank you for sharing it with me.”
“The pleasure is mine, Tamisia. I have enjoyed having you here.” She quieted, growing reflective. “I only wish you were happier on this side of the veil, my dear friend.”
“I suppose I’ll have to learn to be, right?”
Phaedra nodded gently, aware of Sia’s wish to go home and her dashed hopes after last night. When she’d returned to the house with blood on her dress and the acrid stench of bar odors and gun smoke in her hair, Sia’d had little choice but to explain what happened—and why.
She didn’t have to confess about her feelings for Trygg, but she’d been an emotional wreck and it had helped having someone to lean on. Phaedra had listened patiently, offering no judgment for Sia’s foolishness in getting involved with a man who was incapable of seeing her as anything other than an obligation, a liability.
But it was worse than that. Sia had allowed herself to care for Trygg the way she never had for any other man.
When she wasn’t frustrated or infuriated with him, she was terrified of having to admit to the realization she might actually be falling in love with him.
Which only made the prospect of remaining in Rome even less appealing.
