I join my friends around the fire, where strips of meat cook over the flames. The guys are excited about eating real meat. I don’t blame them. Most of us only ever ate meat-sub made with insect or algae. My mouth waters. I want to taste the meat, but not if it kills me.
And if they all die and I’m left alone? I glance over my shoulder at Eskar. Well, not totally alone. He’s been guarding the ship by himself. I can’t leave him sitting there on his own while we feast.
“You won’t join us by the fire?” I ask Eskar.
He shakes his head. “It’s too hot for me.”
“Do you want some meat?” There is more than enough to share.
“Stop sucking up to the Paohl,” Calloor snaps.
“His name is Eskar, and I’m being polite.” The fire is hot on my face, stinging my cheeks. I ease back a few centimeters, not wanting to admit that I am getting too hot. How much of his DNA was in the barb and how is it changing me—besides the lust and my cooler body temperature?
“That would be lovely,” Eskar says.
Calloor pulls a face.
Ava puts two pieces of meat in a bowl. “I want to know what’s happened since he’s been here.”
It’s a relief to get up from the fire. I take the meat to Eskar. His long legs are stretched out in front of him, his hair is like liquid moonlight, lit with ever shifting blues and greens, and he watches me like I’m dinner. I almost trip and land in his lap. My damn body is betraying me, like it wants to press up against him. This close I can smell him. Crisp and sharp. I want to lick him and find out if he tastes the way he smells.
I should have stayed by the fire where it’s safe. But I’m here now, so I hold out the bowl.
He picks up a strip of meat and starts eating it. His gaze never leaving me. “Will you join me?”
I glance back at my fellow humans. Then at him. Being alone with Eskar could be dangerous. There’s a need pulsing through my body that isn’t mine.
The meat in my bowl is growing cold.
“What’s happening to me?” I don’t sit, and my stomach grumbles.
“Your body accepted me as your mate. I wasn’t sure that would happen. But I was hoping. Now you are drawn to me.”
He isn’t lying about that. I don’t trust myself to be alone with him. I’d be naked in seconds. “When will it wear off?”
“When I’m dead.”
Great.“And when will that be?”
Eskar glances up at the stars. “Three days, it’s hard to tell. This planet changes everything. Maybe four days.”
My heart lurches and I gasp. That wasn’t the answer I was expecting. “What? You’re dying?”
He lifts his tail. “I used my mating barb. If I’m unsuccessful in securing a mate, then I’ll die.”
“Then why didn’t you ask me first?” Why slip me the equivalent of an alien roofie?
“Because I’m done with all of this.” He sweeps his hand over the table. “The watching, the waiting and nothing ever changing. Your ship arriving was exciting, and that it happened on my watch…it is a sign.”
“So you thought it was a chance to steal a mate?”
“I have stolen nothing. The choice is yours, as is tradition.”
“If I don’t become your mate, you die. What kind of choice is that?” What kind of world did he come from where that was acceptable? Normal?
“And? That is how it is. There are many more Paohl men than women. Usually there is more discussion, but you were dying. Sinking through the water. You looked beautiful and peaceful, and I almost did nothing. Instead, I have been selfish, and I have damned you to this existence. You shouldn’t have thanked me for saving your life. You are right to hate me.”
I chew my lower lip. “I don’t hate you.”
