Layla’s heart started beating faster. There was only one “miracle” drug that could ever heal a shrapnel-shredded body. “A new drug? As in a hybrid serum?”
Jayson met her gaze, his blue eyes steady. “Not exactly.”
“What does that mean? Either it is or it isn’t.”
Jayson sighed. “Okay, the drugisbased on a hybrid serum, but Dick assured me it’s nothing like the stuff that was used on Tanner and Minka.”
“Dick assured you?” Layla shouted, finding herself on her feet and having no clue how she got there. “And you believe him? That serum kills people. Or drives them insane. You know what Tanner and Minka went through, and they were the lucky ones! You can’t seriously be considering letting him put that stuff into you.”
Jayson stood, wincing as he straightened up too quickly. But he paid no attention to it. “Yeah, actually, I am. His scientists have worked out all the bugs, and they don’t expect any negative side effects. I won’t even get fangs and claws. Dick would never let me take this drug if he didn’t think it was safe.”
Layla suddenly couldn’t breathe. This was what Dick had been planning all along. The deputy director had befriended Jayson because he knew a disabled soldier would willingly take an experimental drug for a shot at being whole and healthy again. He’d been planning to use Jayson as a test subject for the next generation of hybrid serum from the day they’d met.
Anger like she’d never felt consumed her, and she felt little stabs of pain on the tips of her fingers as her claws extended too fast. Dick was flat-out using Jayson’s insecurities about his injuries to manipulate the hell out of him, and if the deputy had been there right then, she would have ripped off his lying face.
“Don’t you see he’s using you?”
Jayson flushed beneath his tan, and Layla immediately regretted her choice of words. She’d made it sound like she thought he was the kind of guy who could be used in the first place—a victim. It was the worst, most hurtful thing she could have said.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean—”
“Yes, you did,” he shot back. “Dick isn’t using me. On the contrary, he’s doing everything he can to help me. He’s not looking at me with pity. He’s not reminding me to use my cane. And he’s sure as hell not telling me to stop fighting and get used to being a cripple.”
“Don’t call yourself that!” she snapped.
“Why not? It’s what I am!” He muttered a curse and ran his hand through his hair, making it stick up every which way. “Look, I might barely be able to walk some days, but I’m not blind. I know how much you and everyone else hate Dick, and maybe you have your reasons. But knowing what it’s like having people prejudge and dismiss me two seconds after seeing my limp, I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Regardless of what you think, he’s not using me. He’s giving me a chance to flip the script and get my fucking life back.”
Layla knew it would be better to let it go for now and try to talk to Jayson when he’d cooled off. He had to believe Dick was being honest and that this drug could fix him. Because if he didn’t, he’d be admitting he was never going to get any better than he was right now. But how could she let it go? How could she let the man she was in love with take a drug that might turn him into something she didn’t even recognize—or worse?
“Get your life back, huh?” she asked. “By taking a drug that could end it?”
When he didn’t answer, Layla stepped closer and took his hand. She wanted him to know that she was there and wasn’t going anywhere.
“I know how hard your injuries have been on you, but are you so desperate to get back what you had that you’re willing to risk your life without even thinking about us?”
“I am thinking about us,” he said softly. “What kind of life do you think we’re going to have if I can barely walk?”
“Our life will be just fine.” She squeezed his hand. “I don’t care about your physical limitations as long as we’re together.”
He yanked his hand out of her grasp with a snort. “That’s easy for a person to say when they can jump out a two-story window and land on their feet. It’s even easier for a person who’s likely to be somewhere on the other side of the world in the next few days, chasing arms dealers and saving the world. But it’s not nearly as easy for the person left behind.” He shook his head, the pain in his eyes breaking her heart. “Layla, I can’t even pick you up and carry you to my bed.”
Tears stung her eyes and she blinked them back. “Then we’ll walk there together.”
“There are some days I’m not even sure I can manage that.” He shook his head, his blue eyes as sad as she’d ever seen them. “You don’t get it. You never will.”
He picked up their plates and slowly walked across the kitchen to put them in the sink.
She followed. “Jayson—”
“Maybe you should go,” he said in a voice so low she barely heard it even with her keen shifter hearing.
Layla froze. Her heart felt like someone had ripped it out and stepped on it. The pain was so intense, she had to grab the edge of the table for support. Thirty minutes ago, she thought things were back to the way they used to be. Now, it looked like this might be the end for them.
She turned to leave, tears blurring her vision. She hoped Jayson would stop her before she reached the door, but he didn’t. She paused, her hand on the knob, then turned to look at him. He was still standing at the sink, his back to her.
“I know I don’t have any right to ask this, but could you at least wait until I get back from wherever it is I’m going on this mission until you do anything?” she asked. “Please.”
Jayson didn’t answer.
