Her expression lightened as she shook her head. “They’re already beginning to heal. Thank you for handling their treatments so well.”
He had to work to keep the compliment from penetrating. He’d only done what she said, and if he’d protected them better in the first place, there wouldn’t be injuries to tend at all.
She seemed to be waiting for him to say something, sohe scrambled for anything he needed to tell her. “I set the last of the flour and cornmeal on the table in there.” He motioned toward the cabin. “Take it with you.”
Her brow furrowed. “Are you certain?”
He nodded. That way he wouldn’t be tempted to come visiting. “Is there anything else that would help? Milk to make butter?”
Instead of answering, she studied him, as though trying to see deep inside. Did she suspect some diabolical motive?
He cleared his throat. “I just want to make sure you have everything you need to help your sister.”
She still didn’t speak, and if anything, her expression turned wary. Had he said the wrong thing? Perhaps she thought of the offer as charity.
Before he could clarify, or even decide if he should say more, she finally responded.
“Have I done something to offend you?”
Her question stole all the words from him. Offendhim? Did she think he’d been trying to insult her?
But she clearly wasn’t finished, so he held his tongue. “Ever since we returned from looking for Steps Right, you’ve acted as though you want nothing to do with me. Did I do something wrong? Are you angry with me?”
He blinked. The way her words lashed out wasn’t like her at all. And why in the world would she think he was upset with her?He’dbeen the one to failher.
He shook his head. “You’ve done nothing wrong.”
She pressed on before he could say more. “Then why have you ... Why are you avoiding me?”
He swallowed down the lump in his throat. If he could avoid thisquestion, he would. But he couldn’t. Perhaps shedidn’t fully realize the truth yet. If not, he needed to speak it.
He didn’t look away from her, but he couldn’t quite meet her gaze, so he focused on her chin. “I was giving you the freedom to ... carry on. To focus on what’s most important. You don’t need to feel obligated ... especially after I was the one to wound both of them.” He motioned back to the calf and mule.
She studied him, her brow lined with confusion. “Obligated? You didn’t mean to shoot Curly or Frisco. Did you?” She tacked on that last part as though suddenly questioning what she’d thought before.
He locked his jaw. “The calf, no. The mule, it was the only way I could stop Purcey from getting away with the rifles.”
“The wound wasn’t mortal, though. I’m guessing you aimed for the crest of his neck? That place would do the least amount of harm to an animal, yet still have a good chance of stopping it. And you kept that thief from getting away with weapons he had no business taking. That many guns could hurt a lot of innocent people.”
Tanner frowned. He couldn’t let her think so well of him. She would find out eventually he was nowhere near good enough for her. Better he convince her of it now than later when splitting ways would be so much harder.
“Lorelei, I’m no saint. I’ve lived a hard life. You could do far better than getting mixed up with the likes of me.” She still studied him, the look a mixture of gentle reproach and something that felt like affection.
Did he really have to unveil all his failings to make her see? If it saved them both heartache later...
He swallowed hard. “I’m not good enough for you, Lorelei. You need to believe me. Everyone who gets close enough to see my failings realizes it quickly enough. That’s why my father brought on my cousin to run the family business instead of me. That’s why he took Cameron’s side when the evidence I brought against him showed Cameron had practically handed the company over to a group of thieves. Even the woman I was supposed to marry only wanted me for my family’s money and connections. Once those were gone, so was she. If you don’t already see my failings with what’s happened to Curly and Frisco, your eyes will be opened soon enough. Better you not have any regrets on that point.”
He took a step back to make it easier for her to do the same. She would leave now. Standing here with her, baring his flaws, hurt too much.
“I’m so sorry, Tanner.” Her voice came out quiet. Gentle enough to take the sting out of her words. They were the right words, though. Lorelei had the ability to see what others missed. He’d realized this about her early, and it was one of the things he loved. At least she was using the skill for her own good now.
But instead of moving back, she stepped forward. Close enough to rest her hand on his arm. His entire body tensed, and he finally met her gaze to see what she could possibly be doing. Being so sweet didn’t make the parting easier. Didn’t she realize that?
She looked at him with a glossy sheen over her eyes. “Tanner, I don’t know your father, so I don’t understand how he could possibly choose your cousin over you. But I know the man who’s been protecting me and Curly andmy whole family these past weeks. I know how hard you work and how fair you are in your trades. I know what a sharp business mind you possess, and I’ve seen the strength of your integrity. I don’t need to hear about others’ poor choices to make my own decision.”
He’d been bracing himself against her good-bye, so it took a moment to hear her words. But when she began stating so many sterling qualities, so many things he wanted to be good at, areas he worked so hard in, a lump rose up to his throat.
As she finished speaking, her hand slid down his arm and captured his own, wrapping her fingers around his palm.
