My legs drape over his shoulders as he shifts back and forth, shoving his face firmly between my legs. His tongue alternates between flat and soft, and firm and pointed when he licks over my clit and hums slightly. Those subtle vibrations make me melt when he sucks gently at my clit and thrusts two fingers deep inside my aching core.
I’m melting. I’m a puddle of pleasure and desire with no strength to resist anything but the ecstasy coursing through me. My thighs close around Cian’s head and one of his arms encircles my thigh to keep me close and pressed against him. Between the thrusting of his fingers and the acute attention of his tongue, I fall apart and come with a loud cry that I try to muffle with my fingers.
I fail, not that I care. By the time each rippling wave of pleasure has faded, I’m breathless and boneless. Cian reappears over me and kisses me deeply, sharing my taste with me and gathering me in my arms. Before long, he’s back inside me and we fuck until the sun is creeping over the horizon. My body sings high with pleasure, my skin tingles with every kiss and bite he covers me in, and when sleep finally takes us both to a place of peace while still tangled in one another’s arms, I feel happy.
For the first time in far too long.
Sleep fades a few hours later when an aching urge to relieve myself rises. Stirring, my legs stretch out alongside Cian’s. His arm rests heavily across my waist and his face tucks gently into my shoulder. He’s sleeping peacefully without a hint of his earlier nightmare harming his features. I could lie here forever and stay with him, but I really need to pee. Untangling from his arms, I move as gently as I can so that he continues to sleep and hurry off to the bathroom. After doing my business, I catch sight of myself in the mirror and the first tingles of doubt warm my gut.
A couple of hickeys warm my throat, and a few dust across my breasts from where Cian lavished so much attention. My hips carry that delicious post-fuck ache and my thighs still warm to the feel of his face buried between them. But what does this mean? We’d been arguing the hour before and then suddenly, we fell into bed with one another.
Did I do something terrible?
Leaving the bathroom, I hesitate in the doorway and watch Cian sleep with the soft glow of the morning sun gradually rising and caressing his body. His left leg is flung out of the covers and for the first time, I get a decent look at the thick, twisted scarring that covers his thigh and shin. I can’t fathom the full details of what he told me last night. I thought I had a strong stomach but it seems when it involves someone I care about, I turn to complete mush. It’s bad enough that he got hit by a car, but to use those injuries against him is another type of twisted.
There’s a shadow of a bruise forming on his ribs from where he got caught under yesterday’s stampede, and tension forms in my chest as I study it. Then up to his black flower tattoo that starts below his right ear and sweeps down his neck to meet with some tribal flames on his shoulder. There, the tattoo twists aroundfresh scars on his bicep. In such a short time, he’s become such a completely different man from the one I fell in love with last summer.
And yet he’s the same.
But doubt worms in my gut while I pick up my underwear. Did I take advantage of how vulnerable he was feeling last night? Was sleeping with him the right thing to do? Sure, he’s sleeping calmly now, but we’ve opened up a can of worms that very clearly felt off the table. Maybe I should have rejected his advances. Would that have been the better thing to do?
A selfish part of me that deeply enjoyed last night screamsNoin the back of my mind. I dress quickly while debating how best to handle the conversation when he wakes up, but it’s hard to ignore the pull of my fight or flight.
I have enough information that I could leave and continue the search without him.
No. I discard that thought almost instantly. I care too much to leave him behind, and doing this without him would mean I’m also worrying about what he’s doing behind me. Fully dressed, I quietly call down for coffee and then check the laptop. The money we’re tracking is still in Spain and we need to catch a ferry across the water to Valencia in a couple of hours. If we’re lucky, the people after us will still be scrambling to search for us in Italy, but that won’t last forever.
Time to bite the bullet.
“Cian?” Touching his warm shoulder, I gently shake him. “Cian?”
He opens his eyes slowly and for a moment I’m staring down into deep, forest-green eyes with the strongest urge to kiss him. “Faina?”
“It’s light. Sorry, but we have a ferry to catch in ninety minutes. It’s time to go.”
10
CIAN
Should I say something?Faina stands at the port of Valencia talking to one of the port authority guards who stopped us for lack of documentation. My previous travel across Europe was through taking back roads and less than legal ways to enter each country, but Faina is bold. She’s taking us right through the front door and seems completely unfazed when we’re caught by the officials.
She must have a reason. Maybe getting caught is part of her plan. I don’t think I’ll ever understand how her mind works, but it’s part of her charm and I love her for it.
I think… I still love her.
What happened last night was phenomenal. I expected her to turn me away, especially after how we ended things, but she welcomed me in over and over again. Even now, several hours later, my body still sings with the sweetness of her touch. I wanted to talk about it before we left the motel but our morning conversation was interrupted by a hotel member bringing uscoffee. Then we rushed for the ferry, and it was far too public to discuss something so intimate.
So I’ve remained quiet.
Faina has too. She hasn’t said a word, and maybe that’s a hint that I shouldn’t either.
Difficult to do when all the good feelings connected to her have been unlocked inside me and it’s the first light I’ve felt in my heart since my family died. That’s got to be another reason I don’t say anything. I can’t use Faina to fill the grief inside me. It wouldn’t be fair on her. Maybe it’s not renewed love I feel but just a desperate attempt for my fractured soul to cling to anything real.
But then she turns to me with a wide smile on her face and leaves the harbor official chuckling to himself as she approaches me. The wind catches in her thick, dark hair and lifts it slightly, adding an extra layer of flowing elegance to her walk. Her deep blue eyes sparkle as she reaches me and suddenly, she’s sliding her arm through my elbow.
“Come on, darling. It’s all sorted,” she says loudly. “I told you it would just be a spelling error.”
“That’s a relief,” I reply just as loudly, and my hand closes over hers. It’s impossible to ignore the thrum of energy that passes between us, but if she feels it too, she doesn’t act like it.
