We’d had the conversation before about my reluctance to tell Sara I love her, and I really don’t want to get into it now. He wraps his arms around me and squeezes.
“Does she know that we still spend today this way?”
“I think she assumes.”
“How do you feel about that?” I ask him.
“I guess I’ll see when I go to North Carolina.” He presses another kiss to my shoulder. I’ve missed this. Being in his lap and all of the affection he showers me with. It’s like he can’t keep his hands or lips off me.
Once, after we’d started fooling around, Sara walked into the living room just as he was nuzzling my neck while I was in his lap, and that led to an hour-long lecture from her about what was no longer appropriate. This led to me sobbing for two hoursand then Wild telling me I could always sit in his lap, so long as Sara wasn’t around.
“Come with me.”
“To North Carolina?”
He nods. “We could talk to Mom together.”
“About…”
“You and me.”
My eyes widen because I hadn’t expected that. “I thought…I just got the feeling last night that maybe you didn’t want…”
He shakes his head. “I want you, Saint. I’ve always wanted this and us. I’ve been in love with you since we were kids.” He swallows, and my heart bursts hearing my favorite words when uttered from Sebastian Wilder’s mouth. “You’re right. A lifetime is a long time, and I don’t want to do it without you. I can’t be without you anymore. This past year, when we weren’t talking…” He clears his throat and pulls my hand to his lips. “I was barely getting by.” Hurt fills me when I hear he was in the same amount of pain I was in. “But there are some obstacles. More than just my mom and our family.”
“Your job?”
He nods. “I never expected to reach this level of success and now…” He trails off. “Everyone knows who you are to me. You ready for”—he lets out a breath—“a lot of unwanted opinions?”
I swallow, thinking about how I felt hearing Sara say some of the things she said growing up that were more told out of love and concern than malice or judgment.
Okay, there was definitely some judgment, but I like to think she hadn’t meant to be hurtful.
I can’t imagine how I’ll feel about people I don’t know giving their opinions. “Are you ready for them?”
He rubs his lip, and I can see the uncertainty in his eyes. “I’m less ready for the alternative, which is a life when you and I aren’t together. I told you a really long time ago that you deservethe world, and I want you to be happy, and I’m realizing that the only way to be sure you are is if I handle it myself.”
“What if you moved the firm? Maybe somewhere you’re not as well-known?” I offer.
“Leaving Seattle would definitely avoid the opinions of some people, but a simple search of my name will lead to the same discourse anywhere I go.”
“We are just stepsiblings, and technically, we aren’t anymore. People love the movieCluelessfor God’s sake.” I roll my eyes.
He laughs. “True, but weren’t they not raised together, and their parents were only married for a few years?”
“Ourparents were only married for a few years,” I whisper sadly as I recall what little time my father had with Sara.How little timeIhad with him.
“My first argument still stands.” He turns me around to face him, forcing me to straddle his waist, opening up my bare sex. “If we hadn’t been in each other's lives for over twenty years, I don’t think anyone would have a problem. The problem is that we were raised like biological siblings. I mean, you’re like my adopted sister.”
“Sara didn’t adopt—"
“Semantics, Halle,” he says before his lips form a straight line. “We were raised in the same house by the same person.”
I tense at the use of my name and let out a sigh. “Well, this is the situation we are in, so my question remains. Are you ready for this?”
“Come with me to North Carolina tomorrow. We can talk to Mom.”
I bite my bottom lip while I contemplate this. “I have to be back by Monday for class on Tuesday.”
