Great, now Danny’s mind was a blank. He’d wanted Ash’s undivided attention, and now that he had it, he felt like a spotlight was aimed at him. But Danny forced his fear down. He wasn’t standing at his register being humiliated while people watch.
This was Ash. If Danny was spending centuries with him, he needed to stand his ground. “His name was Brad.” Just saying it made him want to throw up. “Gorgeous enough to disarm you and charming enough to make you believe anything he said. The first four months were every guy’s dream, until it turned into my worst nightmare.”
Danny paced as he talked, sipping his coffee just to give his hands something to do. He told Ash about the arguments, how Brad had taken control of every part of his life, even in the bedroom. How Brad had tried to slowly erase who Danny was and replace him with Brad’s version of perfect.
Ash didn’t say a word, letting Danny purge years of abuse and violence. Although he continued to growl whenever physical abuse was mentioned.
The longer Danny talked, the more rage filled him for what Brad had done. “It wasn’t even the abuse, which was bad. It was the fact—” Danny swallowed, trying his best to compose himself. When Ash stood, Danny held up his hand, shaking his head. “I need to do this. I need you to know everything. If you hold me, I’ll fall apart.”
Ash lowered back to his chair, but Danny saw in his eyes how much it hurt Ash not to comfort him. That alone said so much about who Ash was compared to the monster Brad had been.
“One night, the fighting was particularly bad. I tried to keep the peace most of the time. I know that sounds cowardly, but every moment he wasn’t pissed off was a moment I was safe.”
A breathless curse fell from Ash’s lips, his jaw clenched so tight teeth should’ve shattered.
“I don’t know if it was because he had a few drinks in him or he thought his control over me was absolute, but—” Danny rubbed his arms, focusing on Ash’s bare feet. “He invited this guy over. Said maybe we could spice things up.” He gripped his arms tighter. “When I refused, he thought threatening me would get me to comply. The other guy freaked out, said he wasn’t into that kind of thing and left.”
Ash rose from his chair and moved closer but didn’t crowd, like he was on emotional standby.
“Brad became enraged, said it had taken him weeks to convince his friend to come over. I accused him of sleeping with Jacob, and Brad lost it.”
Danny turned away from Ash and set his coffee mug aside. His hands shook so badly he had to focus on a pair of Ash’s boots tucked neatly aside. That’s what Danny latched onto. Their motorcycle ride together, the diner where he’d finally lowered his walls. When he’d fallen asleep in Ash’s arms, waking up feeling the safest he had in years.
The shirt slipped over his head then Danny let it fall to the floor, his back exposed for Ash to see just how bad that night had been.
“Jesus fucking Christ, baby,” Ash hissed, his tone filled with horror and pain.
“He grabbed the knife off the cutting board I’d been using when his friend showed up.” Danny hugged himself, limbs shaking as tears rolled down his cheeks. “He had this look in his eyes, like he wasn’t even there. A blind rage, someone explained later. I’d hidden the abuse from Isaac, too embarrassed to tell him. If Isaac hadn’t showed up and found me…”
Strong arms slid around Danny, then Ash turned him, pulling Danny to his chest. “I’m so goddamn sorry you had to go through that, Danny. Fuck. I’m so sorry.”
He brushed a hand down Danny’s back, like the scars didn’t repulse him, and Danny lost it. Everything he’d held inside of him, every cry he’d been denied, spilled out of him as Ash held him. When it became too much, Ash lifted Danny into his arms and carried him to the bedroom. Ash didn’t set him down. He simply crawled onto the bed with Danny still clutched against him.
When no more tears would come, Danny curled deeper into the safety Ash had given him since the moment they met.
“It can’t be just fate,” Danny murmured.
Ash rubbed his back in slow, gentle circles, grounding Danny, just like he always did. “What do you mean?”
“I’m not letting something cosmic take credit for how I feel about you. I was existing in a muted world until you walked through those sliding doors. Color suddenly burst all around me.”
“Felt the same way when I stopped you and you turned around. It was like finding the unicorn you’d been searching for your entire life.”
A smile tugged at Danny’s lips. It was the sweetest thing anyone had ever said to him. Kind of corny but mostly sweet. “Can I ask you something?”
“Am I going to be sleeping on the couch tonight if I get it wrong?” His arms tightened a little. “I’m not batting a thousand, and I’d much rather—”
“You’re rambling.”
“Shutting up.”
Ash would never fully understand the gift he’d given Danny. He smiled. “I was going to ask if I can leave some clothes here and a toothbrush.”
“Honey bear, I’d move you in if you let me. I’d grab my brothers and pack up your things and wake you up every morning with bear hugs.”
Danny threw his head back, laughing at not only the pun but the goofy, crocked smile Ash wore. “I ask about a few clothes and you hit me with moving logistics?”
Ash gave an unapologetic shrug. “I don’t do things halfway.”
