“So you do think it’s her fault,” he surmises.
“No,” I growl out. “I wasn’t fucking lying. I think she’s an asshole, but I should’ve stopped it. I should’ve…” My anger drains as fast as it came. “I should’ve defended Charlie, should’ve said anything but laughed it off, pretending like what you all were saying didn’t matter.”
Jack grimaces at the reminder of his own role, but doesn’t comment.
“It wasn’t just that night, though,” I admit lowly. “My silence was one nail in the coffin, but what went down that night wasn’t what buried it.”
He frowns, reaching out to mute the television, leaving us in a taut silence. “I don’t understand, man. If it wasn’t that, what was it?”
I swallow thickly, my throat bobbing. Jack isn’t the person I should be talking to—his behavior around both Bliss and Rachel is proof of that—but the situation is eating me alive.
“Marisa and I slept together.”
Jack blinks, his mouth dropping open. He sits up, muting the television, as he stares at me. “You cheated on Charlie?”
I jerk in shock. “What?No.It was like three or four years ago, way before I ever met Charlie. I guess it was one of those things where we always wondered ‘what if’.” A bitter laugh escapes me. “We were both single, and it just happened one night after a few drinks, except it was a shitty lay—awkward and uncomfortable. I mean, we both got off, but fuck.” I scrub a hand through my hair. “We both agreed it shouldn’t have happened, that we just didn’t feel that way about each other.”
“Shit, man.” Jack rubs a hand over his jaw. “And Charlie found out?”
“When Bliss was talking shit that night?—”
He curses. “I remember now. She was talking about you and Marisa finally getting together, like you were some star-crossed lovers or some shit.” I mouth the wordstar-crossed, and he smirks. “Fuck off, asshole. I know Shakespeare.”
“Anyway,” I continue, “Charlie asked me point-blank, and I couldn’t lie to her. Not saying anything was one thing, but actually lying to her face?”
“They’re both forms of lying,” he points out.
I slump down, saying miserably, “I know.”
“So why? You must’ve known this would come out eventually, right? With friends like ours…”
“Right, except no one knew but me and Ris. We knew what Bliss would be like if she found out, so we made sure she didn’t. I never…I didn’t think—” I rub the heels of my palms into my eyes. “At first, I didn’t want Charlie to worry. Marisa was my friend, and I figured that if Charlie knew?—”
“She’d want youto stop hanging out.”
“Right,” I agree easily. “And then a few months passed, and a few more. And it got to be this huge thing, and I was terrified of losing her.”
“So what? You figured what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her?” he guesses.
“Exactly.” A bitter chuckle escapes me. “Except this hurts more than anything else ever could. She says she can’t trust me now.”
Jack nods, picking up his beer and tipping it to his lips, taking a long swig. “Can’t blame her for that. Charlie also probably thinks you’re an asshole, with friends like us.” There’s a sheen of shame coating his expression, and he won’t look directly at me.
I hesitate, wondering whether this is good time to bring it up, but…fuck it. “You were talking a lot of shit about Rachel that night.”
His throat bobs, and he tugs at the collar of his shirt. “I know.”
“You were talking shit about Rachel a couple of days ago.”
“Iknow,” he grunts. “I actually…I ran into her yesterday. Last night…” There’s something that looks a lot like regret in his expression, his mouth turning downward. “It doesn’t matter. Bliss?—”
I point my bottle at him. “If I’m not allowed to blame Bliss, you aren’t either. We’re in control of our own choices, man.”
He eyes me before sighing. “Yeah. It’s no joke that Bliss brings out the worst in people, though. It’s her fucking superpower.”
“Maybe she just brings the truth out in us,” I return grimly, turning my attention to the quiet TV. “Maybe the rest of the time, we’re wearing masks, pretending to besomething we’re not, and then Bliss whips them away, shining a light on the real us.”
Jack huffs out a resigned sound. “Know just what to say to bring us down, don’t you, bud?” He swigs his beer again. “Always knew I was a prick, but good to have my nearest and dearest confirm it.”
