“Well,” he says eventually. “That’s me away. Bye.”
He pushes forwards. I step back to let him past, and that’s when I notice the poster that’s fallen off the kitchen table and onto the hardwood floor. I open my mouth to warn Cameron, but it’s too late. He steps on it and skids, stumbling back onto his weak leg. I watch, horrified, as the knee crumples beneath his weight, and he collapses onto the floor.
“Shit.” I run to his side. “Shit, are you okay?—”
He waves me off, turning his face away from me. “Move,” he manages to force out, his teeth gritted. “Don’t touch me.”
I grab his arm to help him up, and his whole body tenses. He plants a hand in the middle of my chest and shoves me away so hard that I stagger back. I stare at him, shocked.
“I said don’t touch me!” he snarls up at me, his face red. “Get away from me!”
I shift back, giving him space. He closes his eyes, breathing hard. For a long time, he doesn’t move, sprawled across the floor.
“Cameron—” I start.
“Shut. Up.”
His face is twisted in pain. He’s struggling to breathe through it. My ribcage feels like it’s being pried open.
My fault. This is all my fault.
I clamp my mouth shut, watching as he slowly levers himself upright and grabs the edge of the kitchen table for support. His cheeks are red.
“You make it so much more embarrassing than it needs to be,” he spits out. He tests some weight on his leg, and pain flickers over his face. I feel like I’m going to fall apart.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “This is all my fault. I’m so sorry.”
He looks up at me, eyes flashing. “What,” he says coldly, “are you apologising for? How you treated Summer? Or my leg?” My eyes fall to his knee, and he groans out loud, wiping a hand over his face. “God. I could honestly kill you, Alec. I could kill you. This is all because of me, isn’t it? You let Summer go home because of me. Because you feel guilty.”
I swallow thickly. “I hurt everyone. I hurt you without meaning to. How am I meant to keep her here? She could have died. I already ruinedyourlife?—”
Before I know what’s happening. Cameron grabs me by the front of my shirt and slams me against the wall so hard all the air is knocked out of me.
“You did notruin my life,” he growls, getting up in my face. “The idea that I’m so pathetic that someone elsecouldruin my life is insulting.”
My throat feels like it’s closing. “You’re in pain, all the time,” I manage. “You probably will be for the rest of your life.”
“Right,” Cameron snarls. “So I guess I may as well just die, right? Never mind that I washappy. I had a job I liked. I hadher.I hadeverythingI wanted. But none of that matters to you, does it? You look at me, and you think I’m just some…some tragedy.” He shakes his head, lips thinning. “I know you don’t want to talk about that night, but we’re going to. We need to get some things straight.”
It feels like a door slams shut inside me. “No,” I say.
He ignores me. “The night your dad died,Itold you to leave the farm and go out drinking. Me. Wasn’t even your idea.”
What is he doing? “I don’t want to talk about this.”
“We shouldn’t have even been working that day,” he continues. “The weather was too bad, but because your dad was a shitty, abusive person, he didn’t give us the day off.Hisfault.”
Ice trickles down my back like rain. “Stop it.”
He just tightens his grip on me. “It was your fatherwho insisted on trying to move a forty-thousand-pound piece of equipment when the wind was at eighty knots. Because he was a mean, stubborn git. Him. His choice. His fault.”
My heart is pounding. I look down at his hand where it’s still planted on my chest. I don’t want to be here. I have to leave. “Let go of me.”
“No.I’mthe one who chose to go and help your dad. I knew I could get injured, maybe even killed. But I chose to do it.” He’s up in my face. “My choice. My fault. Not your fault.”
I can’t talk. With every word, he’s prying the lid off the box of memories. The feeling rising up in me is overwhelming.
“And you know what else?” Cameron asks. “I’m glad you weren’t here. Because if you had been, you’d be dead or injured too. And as much as I want to kill you, I don’t actually want you dead.” He shakes his head in disgust. “You dare to use my leg as the reason why Summer can’t stay here? I’m not your tragic backstory, Alec.I’mnot going to be the excuse for why you’re a shitty person.”
