Alec zips his coat back up and heads to the kitchen door. “I’m going to check in on the sheep,” he says. “For the love of God, please,please,juststay here. We can talk in the morning.”
I don’t respond. I hear his footsteps disappear into the lounge. The front door slams against the wind. I sit frozen, shivering as I stare at the dirt under my glittery nails. Crumpet creeps up and licks my ankle, but I don’t pet her. I don’t do anything.
My phone lights up on the kitchen table as it catches signal. Lulu has sent me several messages.
LULU:
I booked a taxi to arrive at six tomorrow morning
Siri says the weather will be clear by then and that girl has never lied to me
I’m happy you had a great holiday babe, but it’s time to come home.
Everyone here misses you <3
Everyone there misses me.
I force myself to stand. I should go pack.
SIXTY-SIX
SUMMER
As the pink morning light washes through the window of my guest room, I zip up my suitcase and set it carefully on the floor.
I feel numb. My eyes are gritty, and my head is fuzzy from lack of sleep.
Alec didn’t come back to the farmhouse all night. The storm finally dissolved around four in the morning, and now the dawn is spreading across the calm sky. Birds cheep cheerfully in the still trees, as if nothing ever happened.
My phone buzzes. The taxi is here. I grab my cases and cast my eye over the room again. I’ve left it all clean, wiped up every trace of myself. The only signs I was ever here are the dress and shoes Cameron bought for me at the end of the bed, and the letter I left for Fraser and Cameron on the desk. I feel terrible for leaving without saying goodbye to them, but I can’t stay here.
I drag my case out of the guest room and into the lounge.
It’s eerily quiet after the chaos of last night. I spot the blanket Alec and I fell asleep under rumpled on the sofa. Crumpet and Scout are curled up in Scout’s bed by the cold fireplace. Scout flicks an ear at me in greeting. As I heave my case to the front door, Crumpet pads over.
“Hey, baby,” I whisper, bending down and pulling her into a tight cuddle. Shebaas at me, licking my cheek. “I am gonna miss you so much,” I say into her wool. “For ever and ever. You be good, okay? You have the best life.” I kiss her forehead and force myself to stand. She follows me to the door, tiny feet trotting against the wooden planks.
My heart breaks. “No, honey. You can’t come with me.”
Shebaas, slipping between my legs and falling over. Tears prickling my eyes, I open the front door and slip out, careful not to let her escape. Her face is mournful as I shut the door behind me.
The journey back to London feels even longer than the journey up. The taxi gets stuck in traffic. I have to run to catch my flight, which ends up being delayed anyway. When the plane finally takes off, I watch blearily out of the window as Inverness fades away, the green hills of Scotland disappearing behind a thick fog of cloud. My phone sits dead in my lap. I’m sure I have a million notifications to go through, but I’m not going to look at it until I’m back home. I don’t have the energy. I lean back against my seat and fiddle with my complimentary water bottle.
“Hi,” a voice says over my head. I look up. The flight attendant is standing over me, smiling brightly. “Sorry to bother you, but me and the rest of the crew were wondering…are you the girl from that lipstick meme?”
I glance past her. Several other flight attendants are watching. I feel the familiar urge to switch myself on. To give them a big smile and be sweet and nice and bubbly.
I try. Genuinely, I do. I try to become Summer Faye.
I don’t have the energy.
“No,” I say eventually. “That’s not me.”
She frowns. “Really? I mean, your boarding pass says?—”
“It’s not me,” I say. “You must have made a mistake. Excuse me, I’m trying to sleep.” I look out of the window pointedly.
After a moment, she walks back down the aisle. Probably off to write a post about how she met Summer Faye and she was a total bitch.
