“Of course you’re not. I believe you.”
I blink, taken aback. “You do?” I look at his hand on my leg. “Most people don’t, I don’t think. Even after I got diagnosed, my mum never really believed it.”
“Your mum sounds kinda rubbish, London,” Fraser offers, eating a bread roll in two bites.
“Oh, no, I didn’t mean to give that impression. She’s just so smart and driven. It’s really hard for her to imagine that not everyone’s brain is built the same, I guess.” I shake my head. “It’s fine. I just wish I got diagnosed sooner. I failed most of my A-levels. She was so disappointed in me.”
She’d spent so much money getting me private tutors. She had her heart set on a nice university for me. She just couldn’t understand that the things that came effortlessly to her felt basically impossible to me. I remember sitting in the exam hall with my hands jammed over my ears, getting desperately distracted by the sound of the invigilator’s footsteps and the ruffle of other peoples’ pages. I could barely even read the questions. Nothing made sense. It was a lot of time and money down the drain.
“That’s more A-levels than I got,” Alec says, sipping his wine.
“What?”
“I dropped out at seventeen.”
My mouth falls open. “Youdropped out of school?”
His mouth quirks. “Is that so hard to believe? I had a job set up for me from the moment I was born.”
“Yes, but you’re such…such hot-professor vibes,” I blurt out.
“Hot-professor vibes,” he repeats, looking like he’s trying not to smile.
“Am I hot-farmer vibes?” Fraser demands. “Call me hot too, quickly.”
“You just seem really…academic, I guess? You’re so smart. You have sixty million classics in your bedroom. You have a copy ofWar and Peace, Alec. A copy that’s beenread.”
He just shrugs. “I loved school. I loved books. But managing Lochview was more important, so I dropped out.”
“No,” Cameron says flatly. “You didn’t. Don’t lie.” He mops his bowl out with bread. “His dad took him out of school,” he tells me. “Against his will.”
The temperature in the room drops.
“Well,” Alec says calmly, “I didn’t fight him on it.”
“’Course you didn’t. He was terrifying. Doesn’t meanyouchose it,” Cameron growls. “Your dad decided you working was more important than you getting an education, so he forced you to drop out and work eighteen-hour days as a seventeen-year-old boy.”
Alec doesn’t deny it. “It was a year after my mum died. I’d told him that I was planning to go to university after I got my A-levels,” he tells me. “We had a big argument about it, and he decided it was best to stop my education. In hindsight, he was right.” His watch beeps, and he checks the time. “I should go. I have some paperwork to finish.” He kisses my hair, stands, and leaves the room.
I watch him go, my heart beating in my throat. “That seriously happened?”
“He just stopped showing up at school,” Fraser tells me. “Out of the blue. We’d just got our grades back from our mocks, and he’d gotten an offer from Oxford. Apparently, his dad didn’t like that. Next thing we knew, he stopped coming to school, stopped answering his phone. A whole month went by, and no one knew where he was. We thought he’d died. We kept going to the farm, and Mr Gray kept telling us to go away. We had to wait until he was outta town, and then we snuck in.” His normally cheerful expression clouds over. “Alec was in a bit of a state when we found him.”
“What do you mean?”
“He was locked in a shed,” Cameron says flatly. “Mucking out the animals. It was four degrees out, and his hands were shredded because he hadn’t been given gloves.”
“What? He waslocked in?”
“Mr Gray was ‘teaching him work ethic,’ apparently. He’d confiscated his phone and computer, so he couldn’t reach out to anyone.” Cameron’s face is twisted. “He was a mess. Mr Gray had him working every minute of the day. Wouldn’t let him take weekends. Wouldn’t let him leave.”
“It’s why we started working on the farm,” Fraser adds. “To keep an eye on him. We weren’t sure Mr Gray wouldn’t…I don’t know. Hurt him. Mr Gray didn’t want to let us at first, of course, but he sweetened up when he realised he could pay us peanuts because we were minors. Things got a bit better after that. He certainly never locked Alec in a shed again. Was still a bastard though.” He tips his glass at Cameron. “God, remember how you and Isla used to smuggle him books from the school library ’cause Mr Gray wouldn’t let himread?”
I’m horrified. “That’s horrible.”
“Aye,” Cameron says. “Worst part is, Alec tried his heart out for him. And he still does now. He’s still working himself to death for his dad.”
I feel my eyes burn. Fraser makes a sad noise. “No. Don’t cry, angel. Not over a dead man. Come on.” He stands and offers me his hand. “Let’s get you to bed.”
