“Amanda, for the love of God, let me touch you! Last night we were not alone a second, your father was always there!” he cried, but she silenced him, pressing her fingers against his lip.
“Let’s go into the maze,” she urged him. Catching his hand, she hurried down the back steps, pulling him along. She knew the maze, she had played within it as a child, and now, with fingers entwined with Robert’s, she scampered quickly into the very heart of the foliage. The night was warm with the softest of breezes. The high foliage rustled in the breeze and the flowers, in summer bloom, caught silver light from the moon and lay around them abundantly in a dazzling display of color.
“Amanda!” Robert called to her, but she laughed, winding around a cherry hedge and coming to the statue of Venus with its tinkling waterfall and fountain. The statue was beautiful, draped in marble as if Venus lived, an innocent virgin. Twin cupids played by her head with the long tendrils of her marble hair, and a wrought-iron loveseat awaited those who came to the Venus garden in the maze.
Breathless, Amanda fell into the seat. “Oh, Robert!” she whispered delightedly. “Now! We’re alone at last!”
There was a curious rustling sound, and she frowned, then determined that it was nothing more than the wind in the bushes. She smiled up at her lover, adoring his lean and poetic features, and reached for his hand.
“Come sit by me. I have to speak with you.”
“Amanda, I have to kiss you.”
“Robert! Sit!”
He did so and she curled against him, resting her head upon his shoulder. He bent down slowly to her, very slowly. Then his lips found hers, and the kiss was rich and deep and sweet. She moved her hand against his cheek, and she felt his fingers against her own. Then he gripped her tightly against him. She felt the power of his heart. And she felt his fingers, fervently wandering upon the bodice at her breast, seeking the rise of bare flesh.
Some inner warning sounded and she realized that she was not behaving like a lady. She was in love. She just wanted to touch him, and to be held in turn, and to believe in their future together.
She had to pull away. He was growing reckless with his kisses, and with his hands, and although it was private in the Venus garden in the midst of the maze, she knew that she was tempting the man too far.
“My love, please!” She gasped, capturing his straying fingers and bringing them to her lap. He still didn’t quite seem to hear her. Breathing heavily, he stared at her. He tried to lift his hand to touch her, but she held tight. “Robert—”
“I have to have you!”
“I love you, and our time will come. Robert—”
“But I need you now. I need to feel your lips and I need to touch your flesh, I need to be with you. I am a man, my God, can’t you understand that!”
“Oh, Robert, I long for you too, but we must wait. Surely you understand. My father…” No, it wasn’t her father, not really. It was her upbringing. She was Lord Sterling’s daughter, of Sterling Hall, and even if she was in love, and loved in turn, she had to wait. Until the words were spoken. Until they were joined before God.
“Come to me, love. Feel my lips, my kiss.…”
She was startled when he drew her back into his arms with an alarming force. They had teased and laughed a dozen times together, and it had never been like this. Her frown alone had stopped his ardor before, while now her harried fingers had no power at all against his touch.
“Robert!” Leaping to her feet, she escaped him. He stood quickly, coming behind her, gently holding her shoulders. His voice was harsh when he spoke to her.
“Amanda, come, we’ve played this game again and again. Surely you must feel it, you must ache and crave as I do, you long for consummation of this desire as deeply as I! And I would die for your touch, for your kiss, and still you play the tease, and you taunt and torture me. We are not children any longer. I cannot stand it!”
She swung around, heartfully sorry and somewhat alarmed. She didn’t want what he wanted, not desperately at all. Marriage was not the same for men as it was for women. She liked to be close, and she liked to be loved. The rest, she was certain, would have to come with time.
“We cannot, Robert. Not until we are married.”
“Married!”
She knew the moment he repeated the word that Geneva had not lied to her. She need not feel guilty for a single thing she might have done to Robert, Lord Tarryton. Pain spilled through her. She wanted to fall to the ground, and she wanted to scream, and she very nearly wanted to die.
“It’s true!” She gasped, backing away from him. “You’re to marry some duchess for her estates!”
“Amanda—” He reached for her, his misery written clearly upon his face. “Amanda, I love you. I have no choice. It doesn’t have to make any difference between us.”
“You have no choice!” she cried. “Oh, you dreadful, despicable, cowardly bastard! How dare you!” She slapped him as hard as she could across the face.
He gasped, staring at her, his eyes narrowing. “I have no choice!”
“Don’t you ever come near me again. Ever.”
“I am no coward, milady. You wait until your father has chosen for you, lady, and then tell me how to fight what we are honor-bound to do!”
