The biggest one I’ve ever had. The most precious one.
Isn’t she?
My tight little ballerina who’s glorious and gorgeous and pregnant with my baby.
I’m outside now, in the driveway of my posh house and I have to take a second. I have to plow my fingers through my hair and just breathe.
At the realization.
At the fact that I’ve been such a fucking idiot.
All this time, all this fucking time, Pete kept telling me. My own fucking father kept telling me and I…
I’ve been too bogged down and wrapped up in my own self to recognize it. To recognize that I love her. That Icouldlove her.
I had so much hate inside my heart that I never thought I could. I never thought I was capable of it. But she kept telling me too, didn’t she?
She kept telling me that I could love.
That if I love Halo – I do; I fucking do – then that means Icanlove other things as well. But I kept ignoring her like I kept ignoring everyone else.
I straighten up then, an urgency flowing through my veins.
I have to go to her. I have to fucking tell her.
She needs to know. Shedeservesto know.
How I feel. How I’ve been a big fucking idiot. Especially after how I left things with her last night.
I know she’s at school right now. But that’s fine. I’m going to stand outside of those fucking black metal gates and wait for her until she comes out.
But as I begin to stride toward my Mustang, I realize I have a text. My phone’s been on silent all night long and I’ve got multiple missed calls and texts.
From Conrad, Pest. Even Ledger.
And then for the second time in twenty-four hours, a panic like no other grips me. It chokes the life out of me, keeling me over.
But I don’t have the time for that. I don’t have the time to panic or to breathe even because she needs me. My Fae and Halo. And I have to get to them.
I break all speed limits and lights as I race toward the hospital. It’s in the town of St. Mary’s, miles away from Bardstown and my father. Something that would’ve made me happy. To have Fae and the baby away from the clutches of my father.
Not so much now.
Now I’m panicking. I’m angry and frustrated and helpless.
So goddamn helpless.
By the time I reach the hospital, I’m shaking. My body is cold. My bones can’t be contained within it.
I’m not sure where I’m going or who even helps me get there but thank fucking God, I end up at the right place. Because I see the tall form of Conrad, standing, his eyes immediately falling on me as I enter the space.
“Where is she?” I ask, pushing through the panic. “Where the fuck is she?”
Conrad stares at me with grave eyes. “She fell down the stairs at school. It was an accident. We brought her in?—”
I don’t think.
I get up in his face and grab his collar. “What do you mean she fell down the stairs at school? Where the fuck were you? Why weren’t you keeping an eye on her?”
