It’s the same question he asked me the other night too, and like that night, my nerves mount but I try to calm myself.
I try to seem unruffled.
“I came to see you,” I say.
“How did you get here?” he asks – again the same question from the other night, which is not helping me stay calm but again, I try.
“I took a cab.”
Something about that makes him clamp his jaw and stare at me severely. “What the fuck are you thinking? You just got out of the hospital. You’re supposed to be resting. You’re supposed to be getting better.”
Despite all my attempts to stay unaffected, I fist my hands at my sides. “I got out of the hospital two weeks ago. It was a minor blood sugar thing. Iambetter.”
“If you keep running around town like this, you won’t be. You’re not supposed to stress yourself out. That’s what the doctor said, didn’t he?”
“How do you know what the doctor said? You were never there.”
At this, a resigned look comes over his face. “That’s not the point.”
“Did Leah tell you?”
He remains silent but I get my answer and then fuck being calm.
Fuck being collected.
“So you’ve been talking about me to Leah. But you haven’t come to see me.”
Because I’m mad about it.
I’m mad, okay?
Like, he’ll leave me letters every day. He’ll talk to me through them but he won’t come to see me.
And I have waited.
Every.Day.
Every single day that he left me a letter in the mailbox, I actually waited for him to knock at the door. I waited for him to come see me, talk to me, tell mewhy.
So many times I wanted to catch him in the act myself. I wanted to set up camp at my window and intercept him when he came to deliver the letters.
But I stopped myself.
Because I’ve begged enough and I was givinghima chance to come clean.
To tell me.
Now I find out that he’s talking about me to Leah.
How cruel of him to do that.
How unkind of him that he’d rather drive me crazy with all these emotions and questions than come talk to me himself.
He sighs then, plowing his fingers through his hair. “Come inside.”
I glare at him for a few seconds and he returns it with a calm but somewhat heavy look. Then, Idogo inside.
Because I need answers.
