All because he believes in me when no one else has ever done that.
That’s why I hug the envelope to my chest and blink.
I also nod and whisper, “Thank you. Uh, can you call me a cab, please? I’d like to go back.”
His eyes flare as if taken aback. “What?”
I hug the envelope tighter, dig my nails in my waist. “Please?”
At this, resignation washes over his face and he jerks out a nod. “I’ll take you back.”
I don’t argue; the less time spent in his company, the better.
So I nod too and with a last look at me, he moves.
He goes into the bathroom, grabs a shirt and puts it on, even though he’s sweaty from his workout. Grabbing his keys with tight movements, he strides to the door. He jerks it open for me and I walk through it.
And then, we’re riding back to St. Mary’s, me sitting behind his back, clutching his rigid frame and the envelope.
Hugging the love of my life and his belief in me.
His precious, immeasurable, invaluable belief.
Like the cab ride, I don’t remember this ride either, which is a shame because this is my last ride on a motorcycle.
I always knew that if I can’t ride with him, I wouldn’t wanna ride at all.
Soon it comes to an end, my last ride.
Soon, I’m climbing off his bike and standing on the ground. I’m looking at his face, his beautiful, stunning face. Sharp, jutting features.
My Arrow.
Even though he had a helmet on, his hair’s all messy, half damp from his workout and half falling over his brows, framing his navy eyes.
Eyes that have such intense,intenseemotions.
Hugging the envelope to my chest, I say, “I…”
His hands on the handlebar flex and he says in a voice that sounds both eager and low, “You what?”
“I, uh, always thought, back when we lived together, that you were this perfect guy,” I say, biting my lip and I notice another flex, this one on his jaw. “You were so calm and determined and focused, you know? So dedicated to the game, to your goals. I don’t think I’d ever seen anyone with your focus. Not even my sister or my mom. I admired that about you. A lot. The Blond Arrow.
“But then years later, I got to know you. I actually got to know you. I mean, it’s funny because I had all these plans of going away and you were somewhere else. But somehow we ended up in the same place. But anyway, I got to know a different side of you. A new side. This guy who smokes because he’s stressed out. This guy who can get really angry when his trust is broken. Who can be so vulnerable and strong and tortured all at the same time. This guy who can be so mean and rude. Sometimes so much that I wanna smack him. But then sometimes he can be so sweet, you know?”
I chuckle brokenly. “I want to say that… I like that guy. That Arrow. And it hurts me that you think that guy is a failure. That he’s a liability. That he should be ignored. That anything other than The Blond Arrow, any other instinct that you have, is wrong. It hurts me when you beat that guy up for his flaws. Because that guy has something to offer, you know? That guy has so much to offer. You know how I know that?”
His jaw is ticking and ticking.
And I know that the heart that he thinks is dead is pounding inside his chest. I can see the tight vein on his neck throbbing just like his jaw.
“How?” he rasps, his eyes somehow both molten and on fire.
“Because he’s the guy who gave me this.” I motion to the envelope stuck to my chest. “He’s the guy who gave me a chance.Me. A girl who’s never followed a rule. A girl who never ever wanted to be perfect. He gavemea chance. He inspired me to be more. Not only that, that guy forgave me. For something that I’ve been beating myself up for for years, for falling in love with my sister’s boyfriend. He forgave me, Arrow. How can that guy be anything less than perfect when he gave me such aperfectgift?
“Please, please don’t shut him out, Arrow.Please. He’s inside of you and he’s good. He deserves more. He deserves your acceptance. Don’t shut that part of yourself out. Give it a chance, like you gave me. You told me that I could go places, right? That guy can go places too. That guy can do whatever he wants. That guy can be whoever he wants. Just… please give him a chance. Giveyourselfa chance. You can beboth. The Blond Arrow and just Arrow. And do you know how I knowthat?”
This time, he doesn’t say anything.
