mermaidav: Yes! See? You get it. I love how nontoxic your masculinity is. Romance books are basically a how-to guide, and men are sleeping on it because they don’t want to readgirl books.I love our book club.
Really, we go back-and-forth trading recommendations, but calling it a book club amuses both of us. What she doesn’t know is that I’ve already read every book in the digital library she shared with me. Not because I particularly care to read about women getting banged by blokes with bat wings, but because she does and I’m interested in whatshe’sinterested in. And, frankly, like she said, it’s a bit of a cheat code into the female psyche and their sexual fantasies.
And if my research has told me anything, it’s that her sexual appetites lean towards a man who knows how to take charge. And isn’t that just too fucking perfect?
mermaidav: Since I didn’t finish your last pick, I’ll let you pick again.
SpyderMan: Very kind of you.
mermaidav: I’m a giver. Hit me with your best shot, nerd. Or I may not be so generous next time.
I chuckle, a warmth curling through my belly at both the teasing nickname and challenge.
SpyderMan: Let’s tryDune. That’s had a resurgence in popularity lately.
mermaidav: Hmm… that’s the one with the giant sandworms, right?
SpyderMan: Correct
mermaidav: A giant sandworm is kind of like a wiener, I guess.
If there had been something in my mouth, I would have spat it out.
This girl. So bright. So damn funny. No one else so consistently surprises and amuses me. It makes me eager to talk to her every time—eager to try to keep up. It makes me look at things that happen in my daily life and wonder what kind of humorous spin she’d put on them if she were there.
SpyderMan: Not if it’s got teeth. Christ. What sorts of dicks are you dealing with?
mermaidav: A lady never tells.
SpyderMan: Cheeky.
mermaidav: Anyway, if I can’t sleep, I might as well make some $. I was about to post an offer for services, but you got anything better up for grabs, boss man?
SpyderMan: If you’re going for honorifics, I much prefer “Sir.”
The dots appear, letting me know she’s responding. I feel myself stirring in anticipation of her quip, knowing it’ll be her characteristic mixture of sass and wit. To distract myself, I toss back the rest of my energy drink and drop the empty can into the bag at my feet.
mermaidav: Careful, Sir, or I might report you for workplace harassment.
I scrub my face with a groan and inhale deeply. I could flirt aimlessly with her all night, but I’ve got a dead cartel dealer, and I’d quite like to know who beat us to the punch. So I switch to the encrypted text so she can use her private key to read the next message. No one should ever be listening on my own private IRC, but someone in my position can never be too careful. I drop a file into the encrypted chat.
SpyderMan: Better get straight to it, then. I could use a hand sorting and filling in some data for the big boss.
mermaidav:Some data, he says. Do you know how much computing power this is going to take? It’s a pretty big ask, my guy.
I know it’s a colloquialism, but the possessive pronoun stirs something deep and primal in me. Something that wants to hear it from her lips. Something that wants totakeas much as it wants to be owned.
SpyderMan: It is. Are you saying you’re not up to the task?
mermaidav: No, obviously I’m trying to drive up the price.
That makes me laugh again.
SpyderMan: Shouldn’t be too hard for a clever girl like you
mermaidav: See, that’s not fair. You know my weakness is praise. Lol. How much?
SpyderMan: $700 for what I need within the next 24 hours. Every hour after, -$100.
