“I can't...”
“You need to get to your mother,” he says simply. “Let me help.”
I hate accepting help.
I hate it.
But my mother is in a hospital bed, and I am standing under chandelier light, wearing a dress that cost more than my rent.
So I nod.
“Okay,” I whisper.
Caleb watches me for a beat like he wants to say something else.
Then he says, “Are you sure I can't get Julian for you...”
The look on his face tells me he knows my answer.
“No,” I say cooly. “Let him enjoy his evening. It won't matter anyway.”
Caleb nods once and turns away.
Graham guides me toward the coat check.
As we move, I don’t look back into the ballroom.
I don’t search for Julian.
Because if I see him, I'll break, and I cannot afford that right now.
And right now, the only thing I’m allowed to feel is urgency.
My mother needs me.
Everything else can wait.
Chapter 21 - Julian
The ballroom still looks the same.
That’s what throws me.
The lights haven’t changed.
The music hasn’t stopped.
People are still laughing, still drinking, still congratulating themselves for caring about causes they’ll forget by morning.
And yet something in the room feels… wrong.
I don’t know what it is at first. I just feel the absence before I understand it.
I finish a dance with a woman whose name I already don’t remember. I release her with a polite smile and a murmured thank-you that means nothing. It’s all muscle memory now. A performance I’ve been doing my whole life.
I turn, scanning the edge of the dance floor.
Lucy isn’t there.
