“And what’s that?”
“A fucking monster.”
His cold grey eyes stare at me, by he doesn’t speak.
“My brothers always knew, but me?I believed in you.I thought you were the man I needed you to be, and now I feel stupid, because if you let my mom down, should I be surprised that you’d do the same to us?”
His lips twitch, like he’s about to say something, but I don’t give him the opportunity.
“When it comes to her or you, there’s no competition.I choose Maya.My loyalty isn’t blind anymore, because my eyes have finally been opened.”
He scoffs, derisively.“What are you going to do, boy?Walk away?”
“I’m a Knight, and I’m staying, just like the rest of my brothers are.You can try to get rid of me.You can try, but you won’t, because you need us.”
***
It’s done.I’m physically spent, and emotionally bereft.
It’s been hard, having to accept that the man who tucked me in after my mother’s funeral is the same man on the recording.I need to tell my brothers, but right now, I need some light in my life again.Cari’s texted me, and asked how I am.I tell her I’m feeling great.
Because I am.It’s like a huge weight has lifted and now the thought of being with Maya again, lifts me.
I drive to her apartment, and I knock on her door.She opens it, almost immediately, like she’s been waiting for me.Eyes filled with worry skim over my face, searching for answers.She takes my hand and leads me inside.A delicious aroma floats in the air, and I remember that I’m hungry.That I didn’t have any lunch today.
“Did you see him?”
“Yeah.I confronted him.”My voice is hoarse, like I’ve been shouting for hours.I didn’t raise my voice once.It was a miracle that I managed to stay so deadly quiet and controlled.
I thought of my mom as I walked away, wondering how someone so good, so caring and loving, could have fallen for such a man.I don’t know how she did it.How she loved him, or how she stayed with him for so long, long enough to bear him three children.He must have broken her heart into a thousand splintered pieces.
He reduced her to a quivering, broken shell of the woman she once was.And even after that, he didn’t stop.He made a move on Maya’s mom, but I’m sure there were others.I recoil with disgust, then push the thought away, not wanting to taint this evening.
I step inside, cupping her face instantly.“Maya.”I say it like it’s a prayer, a mantra, something sacred.“I love you.”
She backs away and I don’t understand.I fear that I’ve lost her again, but she takes my hand.“There’s someone I want you to meet.”
I don’t see her at first, and then she appears, in the doorway.My breath catches and time slows to a crawl.The years have softened her, aged her, and she seems smaller, frailer, but she is smiling.Guilt and gratitude crash through me.I want to kiss her hand.I want to say I’m sorry.I want to thank her for surviving him.“Ms.Santiago.”My voice breaks with emotion.Maya squeezes my hand.
“Zachary.”
Unable to stand back, I step towards her and hug her.She fusses over me, telling me that I’ve grown into a handsome man.She insists I stay for dinner, so I do.
We sit together, talking quietly and eating, while the weight of the past hovers briefly then melts away.When the evening finally draws to a close, Maya explains to her mom that she’ll come back tomorrow.That she and I need to talk.Her mom gives us a knowing look, and we hug her goodbye.
Once inside the apartment,ourapartment, the door closes and we wrap our arms around one another.She rests her forehead against my chest, and I hold her to me, my chin brushing her hair.We stay like that, clinging to one another, before we kiss, soft and gentle.No urgency or desperation.We have all the time in the world, and so we savor one another, slowly, deeply, fully.
We make love, going slow, nothing frenzied or wild, cherishing one another.Later, we lie in bed, talking into the early hours of the morning.
The apartment doesn’t feel temporary anymore.
It feels like a place where we both belong together.
Chapter 39
ZACH
“That’s what he did … to Maya’s mom.”
