I turned from the window in time to see Cassian lift an eyebrow. “A half a glin? You could get two nights in the capital for such a price, with food included.”
Torquatus bobbed his head. “I have no doubt, but you see, I have the only suitable room for several miles, and that makes it in much demand. My price reflects my desire to allow only the best clientele, those who would not ruin the draperies. You understand, I’m sure.”
I perfectly understood his bullshit. The man wanted the highest payers to occupy the room.
That’s when a thought struck me, and I wandered around the room searching desperately for the most important of matters. “Where’s the bathroom?”
Torquatus scurried over to the window I had just vacated and used a hand to gesture at something past the panes. “There, Mrs. Holt. A lovely little outhouse in the middle of my lovely garden.”
I joined him at the window and studied where he indicated. My mouth dropped open. “You mean one of those sheds?”
“Only one is a shed. The other is the outhouse.”
“The leaning one is the shed, right?”
Torquatus cleared his throat. “I, um, I’m afraid the leaning one is the outhouse. I have requested a handyman come, but he has yet to arrive.”
I could just imagine the skinflint eagerly sending for a handyman.
“And you guarantee that your rooms are without bugs of any kind?” Cassian inquired from his spot near the dresser. His eyes were directed at the gap between the wall and the furniture.
Torquatus puffed out his chest. “Of course! There has never been an infestation of any kind!”
Cassian pointed at the floor below the gap. “Then what are these?”
Torquatus and I hurried over, and my eyes widened. A half dozen little green beetles scurried here and there in the corner. They tried desperately to climb the walls and the furniture, but they ended up tumbling off the smooth wood and onto the floor, where they rocked to and fro on their backs before righting themselves.
Torquatus started back and pressed his arms against his chest as he sneered at the bugs. “Fieldshrouds! How in all the heavens did they get in here?”
Cassian crossed his arms over his chest and looked sternly down at our would-be host. “That isn’t what matters. What matters is that you desired to offer us a room for half a gild a night where there are already ‘occupants.’”
The color drained from Torquatus’ face. “I-I am sincerely sorry. I’ll have them removed at once and the room cleaned-”
“While you perform such basic duties, we’ll be sure to find ourselves a better room,” Cassian insisted as he strode past our flustered host and grabbed my hand. He tugged me toward the door. “Good night and goodbye, Squire Torquatus.”
“Wait!” Torquatus shrieked as he darted around us and blocked the door with his quivering body. “Y-you won’t tell anyone of this, will you?”
Cassian lifted his chin. “Of course. We wouldn’t want anyone else to have the same experience.”
Torquatus’ eyes bulged out of his head. “B-but that will ruin my reputation!”
My acquaintance shrugged. “We cannot seal our lips nor our eyes to what we’ve seen.”
Torquatus scooted up to him and pawed at the front of his shirt. “But there must be a way-” His eyes lit up, and an almost maniacal smile stretched across his face. “Yes! Yes, that’s it! A discount! I will give you this room for a steal! All I ask is that you allow others to give me a second chance! I swear this won’t happen again!”
Cassian studied him impassively for a few moments before he nodded. “Very well.”
Torquatus looked about ready to jump through the ceiling for joy. “Thank you! Thank you, kind sir!” He grabbed Cassian’s free hand and planted a whole field of kisses on the back. “You are the kindest man I have ever known!”
Cassian removed his hand from the overly eager prostrations. “You haven’t named your price yet, sir.”
Torquatus’ face scrunched up, and he rubbed his chin between a few fingers. “Yes, well, I believe I said the original price for a night was a gild, wasn’t it?”
“Half a gild,” Cassian corrected him.
Torquatus winced. “I-I see. In that case, shall we make it a quarter of a gild?”
Cassian reached into his pocket and drew out the coin purse. He poured some of the contents into his palm and pinched the shiniest one in the pile between two fingers, which he then held out to our host. “What about this price?”
