But inside, my stomach is twisting into knots. I can smell Ashlyn’s perfume on my shirt, and all I can think about is Sophie smelling it, thinking I was with someone else. The thought makes me want to peel my own skin off.
“It triggers when you become boss.” Ronan relaxes now that he thinks I’m in the loop. “Which my father thinks is happening soon, given the war with Aurelio. He supports you, Vin. We all do. And I told your brothers that we have a deal with the ports as soon as you fulfill that promise. Which is practically any day now right?”
I look at the woman in my lap. She’s objectively pretty, the kind of woman I would have fucked without a second thought a few months ago and never thought about again.
She’s trying to smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. She looks the way I feel: trapped. But she puts on a good show, laughing, letting her nails trail down my neck, giving back to her brothers as good as she gets. I clear my throat and pat her back, indicating I want her off. She rises and so do I, and Ronan couldn’t smile any bigger if he tried, looking at the two of us.
“Ashlyn’s a good girl,” Ronan says, and there’s genuine affection in his voice. He hooks an arm around my neck, pulling me close so the others can’t hear. “I know who you are, Vin. I don’t expect you to be faithful to her. But as a favor to me, keep your other women well hidden. I don’t want her feelings hurt. You understand.”
Other women. Sophie isn’t another woman. She’s— What? What the fuck is she?
The only woman I’ve ever been able to see myself marrying. The woman who makes me want to quit smoking because she doesn’t like it. The woman whose restaurant burned down because of me, and I promised her father I’d keep safe.
The woman I’m fuckingin love with. The realization hits like a fucking hurricane.
“I got the feeling from talking to you and Matti that you were seeing that Italian broad you were staying with,” Ronan continues, oblivious to the fact that my entire world just shiftedon its axis. “Almost had me scared when it was more than just a quick bang like usual.”
I force a laugh. It sounds hollow even to my own ears. “Yeah, that was nothing.”
Nothing. Sophie, nothing. The words taste like shit.
Ronan grins and claps me on the shoulder. “Can’t believe our good fucking luck! You and I always knew you’d have to marry for an alliance, but to ally with us and for you and I to become brothers? Couldn’t have planned it better myself. One day, you and I will be the bosses in charge. I swear this is the only smart deal our fathers ever made.”
He’s right. The alliance with the Irish is solid. They supported me over Aurelio from the start, even though their father has been working with him for years. Or maybe because of that. But without them, the port deal falls through. Without the ports, the all new Demonio Brotherhood has nothing. We’d go from one war straight into another, and we wouldn’t survive it.
I’ve always known I’d marry for an alliance. I just didn’t know the alliance had already been chosen or that it would come so soon.
“Can she cook?” I ask, because it’s the only thing I can think to say.
Ronan laughs. “She was raised so she didn’t have to cook. That’s what hired help is for.”
Of course she was. I can barely stop myself from rolling my eyes. Images of Sophie in the kitchen, naked except for an apron, making me gnocchi from scratch with two different sauces because she knows I can’t choose between bolognese and pesto. Sophie asking me if love would make me a stronger man, a better boss.
The answer to that is yes. I’m definitely better with her. And I’m about to fucking lose her.
“We haven’t talked about the changes that will happen when you take over,” Ronan says, settling back into serious business mode. “The ports, security contracts, territory divisions—”
Ashlyn refills my glass and tries to settle more comfortably in my lap. I let her, because Ronan looks so fucking happy to see us together, and I can’t afford to make an enemy of the Irish. Not now. Not when everything depends on this alliance.
I down the drink, but it does nothing to relax me. Every muscle in my body is tense, and she pours another.
They start talking about port security, distribution routes, profit splits. All I can hear is the sound of my own heartbeat pounding in my ears like a death knell.
My relationship with Sophie won’t survive this. There’s no world where I get to keep her and honor this contract. No scenario where I become boss and get to come home to her cooking every night, fall asleep with her mouth on my cock, wake up inside her while she whisperssí, padroneagainst my skin.
For a split second, I wonder if I can make it work: Ashlyn as my wife for political purposes and Sophie as my true wife, the old school way with two families we talked about. But I immediately discard the idea. Sophie deserves better than that, and I could never look her in the eye and ask her to do that.
Then I hear in my head her words from one of our first mornings together:I could just mean that I enjoy playing with you until my husband comes along.
Except I want to be that husband. I even told her that, and I meant it.
But that was before I knew about Ashlyn. Before I knew about the contract. Before I understood that becoming boss means giving up the only thing that’s ever made me want to be a better man.
“Another drink, Vin?” Someone pushes a glass into my hand.
Fuck, give me all the drinks. I’m getting fucking wasted tonight.
I look at Ashlyn. She’s pretty. Fiery. Probably good in bed, once I train her the way I like. There’s nothing wrong with this girl.
