I thought giving in to my distraction and creating new memories to replace the fragmented ones from the rave would help quench my desire for him, but I was dead wrong.
Damon Cosgrove has me in a chokehold, and even though I don’t understand why, I’m not about to question it.
Iwillhave him again, and next time, I’m taking as much as I give.
15
DAMON
“Earth to Damon,”West says, snapping his fingers in front of my face.
“Huh?” I blink a few times as I’m startled back to reality. “Sorry, I zoned out there for a second.”
He tilts his head and eyes me curiously. “What happened at the AV party?”
“What?” I ask, my voice sharper than I mean it to be. “Why do you think something happened at the party?”
“Maybe because when I asked you about it, you said it was fine and changed the subject, and that’s the fourth time you’ve zoned out in the last hour.” He purses his lips, his expression thoughtful. “So either something happened at the party, or there’s something else messing with your head right now. Either way,somethingis going on.”
“I’m fine,” I say, giving him what I hope is a convincing smile. “I’m out of it today. Nothing happened at the party.”
Nothing except I let a rival frat member jerk me off in the corner after he scared the crap out of me with a weird stalker/hunter routine, and it was the hottest thing that’s ever happened to me.
Heat spreads through my chest at that thought, but I shove it aside and focus on acting normal and not like I’m harboring this huge secret.
I still haven’t told West what happened at the rave, or about getting jumped when school started up again. And I haven’t said anything about how I can’t shake the feeling that I’m being watched.
I love West like a brother, but I can’t burden him with any of this, especially not when he has his own shit going on.
“You’ve been out of it for a while now,” he says, still studying me like I’m a science experiment. “Since you came back after winter break.”
“I guess I’m just having an existential crisis about school ending,” I say lamely. “I’m not exactly looking forward to going to work for my father in a few months.”
“Okay,” he says, but his expression is still skeptical. “If you say so.”
I give him another smile, even as guilt churns in my stomach.
West and I have been tight since he was fifteen and I was sixteen, and he’s the closest thing I’ve ever had to a best friend. I hate lying to him, but I can’t talk to him about what happened with Xave.
Not while I’m still trying to make sense of it myself.
The prospect of having to work for my dad in a few monthshasbeen on my mind and dragging me down, but that’s not the reason I’ve been distracted.
My neck flushes hot at the rush of memories, but thankfully West is too busy telling me about the three wedding venues he and McKenna went to see over the weekend to notice.
A part of me still can’t believe it happened, but the part that’s really fucking with me isn’t just that Iletit happen, it’s how I loved every second of it.
I can’t even blame the drinks or the MDMA I took just before he started stalking me like a predator circling his prey. The drugs didn’t start kicking in until after we were done, and I was already on my way home after bailing early. And two drinks, even back-to-back like that, aren’t enough to get me drunk. At most, I was a bit tipsy, but still in full control of myself.
More heat creeps over my chest and up my neck as I remember how it felt when Xave was stalking me.
It feels dramatic to call it that even to myself, but that’s what it felt like as he circled me, getting closer and closer until he finally caught me.
But he didn’t really catch me. I went to him.
He walked away, and I followed him.
He might have started things, but I let him finish them.
