“No?” Because that would have totally worked if I knew about it.
“Nope. I have other ways of doing that. I just figured you might come to visit on occasion to discuss this joint enterprise of ours, and if that miracle ever occurred, I would like to be able to offer you a cup of your favorite hot beverage. It’s not a big deal.”
Oh, but it was. I took a sip to calm my frazzled nerves. That kind of sweetness was not on my bingo card, and I wasn’t sure how to handle it.
“Thank you. That was very thoughtful.”
“Tell that to every girl I’ve ever dated.”
“That was your first mistake. Dating ‘girls.’” I finger quoted “girls” because he definitely liked them younger, which can’t have been conducive to a fulfilling relationship for a man of Jason’s intelligence. I wondered if the women he slept with bored him.
“Just an expression. The women I’ve dated haven’t really appreciated my kind gestures.”
“Such as?”
“Well, one girl—woman—liked frogs. She had frog-this and frog-that in her bedroom, so I got her a special visit to the zoo in Boston to see the frogs up close and talk to a frog expert. A whaddyacallit?”
“Herpetologist.” Though I suspected he knew exactly whaddyacallit.
“Yeah, that. Turned out she only liked cute little images on T-shirts or stuffed toys. She thought the genuine article was slimy and gross, but it wasn’t. That was an interesting date. Me and the herpes guy got on like a house on fire.”
I pursed my lips against a smile. Stop making me fall for you.
“Then there was the time I took a woman to this fancy restaurant in the North End, which is usually Italian, but she liked French food. Said crème brulee was her favorite, so I had a special one made by the chef—who I knew from this regular poker game—with her name burned into it with the blow torch, and she said I was trying to make her fat. Didn’t appreciate it at all.”
“Can’t win.”
“Right!” He shook his head sadly, though I could see the slightest grin teasing his sensuous mouth. He waved between us. “This, though. This is uncomplicated.”
“Jason, this is the definition of complicated.”
“I mean, from a dating perspective. We’ve kind of put the cart before the horse, figured out the end game—Super Kid—and now we’re working our way back to basics. Mashed potatoes, cups of tea, great sex. Before you know it, you’ll have to acknowledge me in public. And there you go, we’re a couple.”
He grinned, like it was the funniest thing. And while he could see the humor in our unusual situation, I couldn’t.
It was bad enough I’d included him in my life—forever—because he wanted to be involved in his kid’s life. I got that. I loved that. But I couldn’t allow myself to fall for him as a potential partner. That would be disastrous.
Heartbreaking.
That swing set out back would be for his kids, plural, the children he would eventually have with a woman better suited to his big personality. I was too much of a wallflower to attract a buzzing bee like him for longer than a few seconds in the eon of our lives.
“This was a one-off. Don’t rely on me for your sexual gratification.”
He stirred the eggs once more, turned off the stove, covered the buttered toast, and placed it in front of me.
“Even when you’re not around, maybe I’ll think of you. Add you to the rotation.”
I picked up a fork. “What an honor. Though the heavier I get, the further down the list I’ll fall until, plop, I fall off altogether.”
He took a seat beside me, and we instinctively clinked our forks like we were toasting breakfast. I chewed on my eggs, which were delicious. He couldn’t even mess that up.
“Don’t be so quick to self-deselect from the spank bank, Doc.”
“Time and circumstance will do that for me. Luckily, you can let your imagination run riot because you won’t have to see me for most of the pregnancy.”
He frowned. “What does that mean?”
It was not my best moment, but it was time he knew.
