“Your guilt for no reason will ruin us. That argument was your brother telling you to move on with your life. He cared about your happiness and didn’t want you to suffer. I’ll prove that he didn’t write that note about us. Just wait and see.”
“You believe Jamaica will fix us,” he says. “I know Maxi’s stories of the silk cotton tree as well as you do—the legends, the duppies, the whole rigamarole. But it’s just a myth. It’s magic, and I don’t believe in magic, superstition, or spirits. I don’t think you do either. You’re looking for a way to save a marriage that was never meant to be. Jamaica, with its Obeah or silk cotton tree, won’t change anything between us. Not a goddamned thing.”
CHAPTER 17
OTHELLA
The SSTalamancaat Sea, Day One
Where is Jerry Merriweather? Robbie and I have searched every corner of the SSTalamanca. We explore every empty stateroom and every other room, the social club, the barbershop, and the doctor’s office. By the end of the day, I don’t know which way to turn, so I turn on Robbie.
“I don’t care what Tobias Hartfield or Commander O’Flanagan think. I saw him, and I will find him. I refuse to start my new life in Jamaica looking over my shoulder, waiting for some lowlife to jump out of the shadows and attack me.” I exhale. “I may not have set foot on the island of Jamaica before, but it already holds a special place in my heart, and I won’t let any man ruin it for me.”
Robbie looks at me kindly. “It’s not that I don’t believe you, Othella, but if he’s on board, why hasn’t he come after you?”
As we stroll past the barbershop on the Promenade Deck, the thought of pushing Robbie overboard crosses my mind. “Don’t you dare say things like that to me,” I exclaim. “He’s on this ship. I’m sure of it.”
“But Othella, we’ve looked everywhere,” Robbie responds softly, trying to soothe me.
“There has to be a place we haven’t searched,” I argue. “Maybe he’s one of those people hiding on the ship—what do they call them?”
“Stowaways.”
“Yes, that’s it. They know every nook and cranny of theTalamanca, don’t they?” I suddenly feel like I might cry. “I shoulda known. I get close to happiness and everything goes wrong.”
Robbie guides me to the railing. “Being happy doesn’t mean something bad has to happen. There’s just no sign of him.”
“He’s here,” I mutter. “He might be as dumb as a rock, but he knows how to stay out of sight.”
The ship rises and falls, then rises and falls again. I cling to the railing as a brisk breeze whips through my hair and across my face. Robbie lifts a hand, his fingertips gently tucking strands of my hair behind my ear.
The gentleness of his touch surprises me, mainly because I don’t mind it. “He wants to kill me, and he’ll stop at nothing to accomplish what he’s set out to do. I can’t let Jerry hurt me, Robbie. I just can’t.”
“Jerry? Is that his name? You know him?” The lines around Robbie’s eyes deepen with confusion.
If I had a leather belt like the one my mother used to hit me with, I’d give myself a spanking. How could I make such a mistake? Has having friends and sailing on a cruise ship made me daft? “Can I trust you, Robbie?”
“Of course you can trust me.” His face lights up. “Pinky swear, remember?”
Of course I recall that silly promise. “Let’s walk for a minute.”
Robbie bends his arm at the elbow and offers it to me. I slip my hand through, and we saunter on the deck as other couples parade by.
“His full name is Jerry Merriweather, and he thinks I hurt his brother—he caught up with me at Mr. Abbott’s house because of that, not to steal a brooch. That’s why I need to find him. If I don’t, he’s gonna ruin everything for me.”
“His brother? Was he a brute like Jerry? Was he your boyfriend? Did he hurt you? What kind of man is he?”
My nerves feel as if they are being soaked in gasoline. One more question and I’ll explode. “Yes, his brother hurt me—and I hurt him back.” I pull away from Robbie, but he won’t let me go. “Listen, I might’ve done more than just hurt his brother.”
“Might have? Is he dead?”
The question I’ve asked myself, coming from Robbie’s lips, makes my chest ache. “Yes, he’s dead, but I don’t know if I killed him. I hit him pretty hard in the head ’cause he’d hit me a couple of times and dragged me from one end of the apartment to the other. I couldn’t let him beat me to death. So I struck him in the head with a Smokador ashtray. And I’d do the same to his brother if he came after me.”
“Christ, Othella. You’ve been through some tough times, haven’t you?” Robbie halts, running his hand over his head as if to hold back his thoughts. “What are you going to do if you find Jerry?”
“Tell him I don’t have what he’s looking for and I didn’t kill his brother, not deliberately.”
“You think talking to him will make a difference if he wants to hurt you?”
