“I know that, but what if he thought we were?”
“What if nothing?” I shout. “Clifford never questioned my loyalty, and if he hadn’t died, you and I would never have married.” I cover my mouth. “I’m sorry. That didn’t come out the way I meant it.”
“You said it exactly as you meant it. I am fully aware that I married a woman who doesn’t love me.”
“Oh my God. How can you say that? After all we’ve been through. You know I love you, but you’re using that damn note to tear us apart, and I don’t understand why.”
“I need another drink.”
“You’ve had enough, Tully.”
“I’m a grown man, Vivi. I can drink as much as I want, whenever I want.
“Don’t call me Vivi. I don’t like it.”
“Don’t get your feathers ruffled, honey.” He holds up the bottle of Jack Daniel’s. “You sure you don’t want one?”
“Tully, don’t do this.”
“Do what?” he replies flippantly. “Get angry when we aren’t being honest with each other, Vivi?”
“Damn it, Tully. Stop calling me that!”
“No need to get hysterical, my love.”
“I am not fucking hysterical.” I begin taking off my dress. “If you keep that up,” I point at his glass, “you’ll be boiled as an owl at the reception.”
“I’m already boiled.”
With a groan of frustration, I slip out of my dress, nearly ripping a seam. Then, freeing my silk stockings from the garters, I roll them down as if they’re made of razor blades. “Sarcasm is not attractive on you, dear.”
“Lies aren’t attractive on you.” Tully steps away from his makeshift bar toward me. “You’re too scared to admit you believe me about the note.”
There is a strangeness in his voice, a warning. He’ll say something awful if I don’t stop him.
“Let’s not fight tonight. Not before we leave for Jamaica,” I plead. “I can’t stand listening to you say the same cruel things over and over.” I stab at my chest with my fingertip. “Here, in my heart, in my soul, it hurts so badly I could die from some of the things you imply. Clifford didn’t kill himself.”
“How can you be so sure?” Tully cries.
“Shut up!” I grab a bottle of perfume and brace to throw it at Tully, but I don’t want to hit him. I don’t want to hurt him, and I wish he didn’t want to hurt me. My arm falls limp. “The note isn’t about us. I don’t know who it’s about, but I’m going to figure it out, and when I do, you’ll have to swallow your lies, because there’s no reason for them.” I charge forward and grab his shoulders. “You need to stop this.”
He gently grips my wrists. “Let go.”
The walls move in on me, surrounding me, dangerously close. They know I am losing control. And I can’t allow that. Not before I receive forgiveness at the sacred silk cotton tree. I lower my arms and step back.
The anger washes out of me, leaving Tully and me in an uncomfortable silence.
It lasts an endless, heart-sickening moment, and then Tully strides toward the door with long, quick steps. “I’ll see you on the midnight train.”
I flinch. “You’re not coming to the reception?”
He halts and pivots, retracing his path until he reaches my side. Gently touching my face, he caresses my cheek. I lean into him, and he kisses me softly on the lips, a lingering kiss that ends too soon. “You’ll have a better time without me.”
“Tully, please. Katherine will be disappointed.”
He looks at me as if I were a rare, mysterious beauty, but I am none of those things. When his lips brush against mine once more, I tremble. “I do love you, Vivian Jean. It’s just that I hate how much I love you.”
Then he’s gone, leaving me staring blankly at the spot in the bedroom where he stood just a moment ago. I feel the pressure of his hands on my face, smell the whiskey on his breath, and feel the warmth of his lips on my mouth.
