“Of course, well—yes, I must trust you or—well, I suppose I must if things are to proceed, sort of like trains running straight on tracks to reach their destination.”
“Just so.” He smiled at her, kissed the end of her nose and took her hand.
It wasn’t long before she was lying on her back in bed, all warm as her breakfast toast. She watched Graham stir the embers, watched him turn and walk to her, saying nothing. He removed his bathrobe and stood silently, letting her look her fill at him. It was close, but he kept motionless, his arms at his sides. He didn’t hold his breath.
Her voice came out of her mouth with a bit of a croak. “I love you, Graham, I truly do, but seeing you without your clothes, it’s rather alarming. You are even more different from me than I could have imagined.”
Her eyes had moved in less than a half second from his face downward. He knew what she was seeing and devoutly prayed she wouldn’t run screaming from the bedchamber. Finally, after an eon it seemed to him, she said, licking her lips, which made him want to leap on her, “Oh goodness, Graham, you said we were two halves of a whole. I have to say your half is amazing but still, rather unexpected, and alarming.” She licked her lips again and his jumping on her was close—except he wasn’t a boy, he had fortitude, it was the key. He still didn’t move, he waited, waited.
“In general,” she said, her eyes still on his sex, “I know ina general sort of way what you will do with your half, which is amazing, as I said, but I have to say further that seeing the reality of it is alarming. That man part of you is quite large. I’m sorry, Graham, but I cannot see how it could possibly work,” and he watched her again run her tongue over her lower lip for a third time and he nearly expired.
“Don’t be alarmed, everything will work just fine. Perhaps I could show you, Cam.” Was that his voice, all low and nearly a croak?
Still he didn’t move, and again, waited, waited.
“All right, Graham. I suppose you actually showing me how this all works is the best way forward and I know we must move forward since we’re married and all. But it’s difficult, Graham, I mean, I’m looking at you and imagining, and it’s very worrying.”
But then in the next second she opened her arms to him. He nearly shouted with lust and relief, a heady brew.
When he pulled her nightgown over her head and tossed it to a chair, she gulped, crossed her arms over her chest. “Graham, I don’t suppose we could simply kiss all night. I really like that. It’s quite invigorating.”
“Yes, we will kiss, then we will explore even more activities you’ll find even more invigorating.” He pulled her arms away and gathered her against him. The feel of her, her breasts, her flesh, so soft and warm, it would break a saint. She wanted kisses? He could do that. He remembered Jayne’s advice:Talk, Graham, be amusing, do not grunt, do not stick your tongue down her throat, never rush her on pain of death—yours.And so he leaned down and said, “Dearest one, open your mouth, just a little bit.”
She did and every flower in the world bloomed. “Oh my,” she whispered into his mouth. “Your tongue—I never thought of that. It feels really quite lovely. I feel the strangest things.”
“Strange? Where exactly, sweetheart?” He touched his tongue to hers again, stroked and kissed.
“My stomach, well, no, lower, and it’s really quite delicious.”
Jayne had taught him the importance of control, but he nearly went over the cliff.Ladies first, Alex, always ladies first. Never be a pig.
He kissed her breasts and when she moaned, he believed it the most beautiful sound he’d ever heard in his life. He continued down the beautiful length of her, rested his cheek against her belly. His hands kept going. She squeaked, tried to push him away. Then, from one moment to the next, she was pulling on his hair to bring him closer. “Graham, that is wonderful, truly, but there’s more, I know there has to be. Please show me.”
He was supposed to talk? Be amusing? How could he even speak when his heart was near pounding out of his chest? “Yes,” he said, and went lower—the taste of her, the feel of her, he didn’t know if he could bear it, but he knew he had to give her pleasure first because he would hurt her, no way around that. He whispered against her, “No, Cam, don’t try to pull away from me. Trust me. This is the way things are done. It’s very important to me that you enjoy this. It’s all about your pleasure. That’s right, just relax and let me—” She stilled. He felt her surprise then her eagerness and he gloried in it. When she stiffened and screamed, he quickly closed his hand over her mouth and came into her.
CHAPTER 46
Cam felt boneless yet full of energy at the same time. She wanted to burst into song and she wanted to curl up against him and breathe him in. Amazing what had just happened. She’d had no idea. “Goodness, what you did to me, what happened to me, it was something I never imagined.”
Graham was sprawled on his back, and wondered vaguely how she could put two words together. He was sated, his brain mush, but then he finally managed two words of his own, through great effort. “I agree.”
Cam came up on her elbow over him, energy thrumming through her. “But I didn’t do anything to you, I mean you did everything. I mean I hugged you and kissed you and looked at you—oh goodness. But, Graham, it was so embarrassing and then it wasn’t. I have to admit you were right, it was all very invigor-ating.”
All right, he’d take that bloodless word for the moment. As for suggestions for what she could do would remain unspoken tonight.
“It’s the oddest thing. Even though my bones have surely melted, I still feel so light I could fly to the ceiling and perhaps simply float above us and look down at you. I could dipand swirl about, maybe sing to you—wait, here you are, lying there like a felled log. Don’t you want to dance, Graham?”
She saw his grin in the dim candlelight. “Perhaps soon, Cam. Give me a little while, say another four and a half minutes.”
She leaned down, kissed him, studied his beautiful face, his eyes now vague, dreamy. She said slowly, “You’ve done this before, haven’t you? I mean you seemed to know exactly what you were doing. You have, I know it.”
“Yes,” he said, “but this is different. You’re my wife, the only woman in my life and in my bed forever.”
She was silent, unaware she was lightly kneading his belly, then lightly stroking—but he was. He felt a bolt of lust. No, he couldn’t, she’d been a virgin. She had to be sore. He had to control himself—ah, but in the morning, before they ordered their breakfast, perhaps while she was still sleeping he could wake her up with kisses, everywhere, and he suddenly saw the world through different eyes. She was his. His. She was quiet and he wondered if she was falling asleep.
Cam was thinking of Averil, how she’d broken her vows to her husband and run away with another man, all planned. For how long? She thought of her dead mother, knew to her heels Tansia would have been faithful to her father forever. She whispered against his neck, “I think I want to stay with you forever, Graham. I cannot imagine not wanting you in my life.”
“Good, that’s good. I promise you’ve got me until I fold up my tent and disappear into the ether.”
