I’ve come to learn that there are defining moments in your life. For me, a lot of mine have been horrific, but a few have been filled with happiness and love.
This, right here though, will be a moment that will be ingrained in my soul for eternity.
A beautifully momentous moment.
On shaky legs, I step into the room, not paying a lick of attention to Elizabeth. Not really even noticing Ringo. Because right now, in this moment, my eyes are trained on the little arms waving, and little feet kicking, as the sound of a small cry connects with my soul like it’s a piece of me.
I can’t see her face yet. But I don’t need to. I already know. I already feel it.
This is my daughter, Bobbi.
Slowly I approach the clear Perspex box-like crib, each step bringing me closer, each step showing me more and more of the little baby within it.
“I just dressed her so she can come out for her bottle,” Elizabeth explains, her voice grating on my nerves, but I don’t look at her. I don’t for a second take my eyes off the little baby with a dusting of white blonde hair and long dark lashes, much like mine.
“Oh my—” I sob, pressing my hand to my lips to stifle any more sobs that want to escape.
Rushing closer, I stare in at the little baby, who stops crying when she sees me, her dark grey eyes blinking as she starts to stare.
Everything comes rushing back.
That day in the forest. Feeling her leave the safety of my body to be placed on my chest. The cute little button nose. Her tiny head, covered in mucus and blood. The way she felt on my chest.
My little Bobbi.
My knees go weak, nearly giving out, but Ringo’s strong hands come out of nowhere, holding me up as I try to open the crib to get to my daughter.
“I don’t know how…” I sob, trying to figure out how to use the latch, and Elizabeth rushes in, her smile gentle despite the fact JD now has a gun trained on her, and she opens the crib for me.
“Caroline was warming her bottle in the kitchen,” Elizabeth rushes out, but I shake my head.
“No. I will feed her.”
“Of course,” she steps back. “I can get Caroline to bring in the bottle.”
Again, I shake my head, glaring at Daniel’s mum. “No. I willbreastfeedher.”
Elizabeth’s brows shoot high, her mouth opening and closing, dumbfounded, and now, I give her my full attention as I stab a finger towards her.
“You may have stolen her, but I knew…” I punch the centre of my chest. “I knew deep in my heart that she was alive. I’ve kept up my milk supply for her, andIwill be the one to feed her.”
Tears flow from Elizabeth’s eyes as she nods, stepping back, her hands raised as if she’s surrendering.
Later, she’ll learn that her surrender means nothing. But for now, I need to learn how the hell to breastfeed my daughter.
“Get her out of here,” Ringo barks to JD, who steps forward, pressing his gun to Elizabeth’s head, and she whimpers as she’s escorted out, leaving me and Ringo alone with Bobbi.
Suddenly, I feel out of my depth. How do I even do this?
“I don’t…” I trail off, looking to Ringo for guidance, even though he never had a moment to be a father to Hope.
His eyes are warm as he smiles softly down at me, his touch soothing, giving my arm a gentle squeeze in reassurance.
“I’ll lift her out. You take a seat.”
I nod quickly, not able to talk as I move to the armchair in the corner of the small room, and watch as my big, hulking husband gently lifts my fragile daughter from the crib.
My breath catches as I watch him with her. The hard stare he usually wears melts away, his face lighting up as he smiles down at the little baby, so tiny in his big strong hands.
