Walk down memory lane. Could I do that and keep it together? We’d soon find out.
I gathered my thoughts, then ripped open that box containing my past as quickly as possible.
“I was part of an orchestra and performing at a military ball in DC. He swept me off my feet; then everything went fast between us because he had to spin up. We got to know each other while he was half a world away. When he came back three months later, he proposed. Next thing I knew, we were married and I was pregnant, so I stopped performing.”
I paused for a beat to breathe. Then continued. Telling him everything. From becoming close friends with Hollis during that time to howshe’d helped keep me from falling apart when Trevor was held captive by the Taliban.
When I was done sharing, he asked the one thing I’d left out: “Why did you two get divorced?”
He probably thought I was horrible, thinking I’d left Trevor after the man survived being a prisoner of war. “He left me, not the other way around.”
“Oh.” His eyes shot to his hand on top of mine.
“I’d considered it a miracle Trevor made it home ... only to lose him again, but in a different way,” I whispered.
“I don’t know the details of that op, only that it went sideways and he was taken.”
I didn’t know much myself, to be honest. Part of the problem, in a way. Trevor hadn’t been able to talk to me.
“Him and his teammate were both taken. It was an ambush. Trevor was rescued, but only after he had to watch his friend lose his life.”
Ryder dropped the f-bomb, dragging it out as he hauled me closer for a sideways hug.
“He blamed himself for his friend dying and for him surviving, and it broke him,” I went on after steadying my heart rate. “He was benched from operating for over six months, which didn’t help. I think he didn’t know who he was if he wasn’t part of a team.”
“That kind of trauma doesn’t fade easily,” he gritted out.
“He pushed me away after that. Wouldn’t let me in. Then one day, he asked to separate. Next thing I knew, we were getting a divorce. I tried to fight for us, to save our marriage, but he wouldn’t let me.”
“He had to be able to save himself first. And based on what I know about him now, he got better and eventually went back to operating.”
I lifted my head to look over at him. “We talked about getting back together after that, but we decided it was best if we just stayed friends. Eventually, I met Mitch and only agreed to be his friend at first, but he wore me down.”
Thinking back now, he’d probably manipulated me, but I’d never seen the big picture of what he’d been doing to me then.
“I actually met Mitch the same night I did Trevor at the first ball. Both men tried to win me over. Clearly Trevor won out.”
“Damn.”
Yeah, I could think of a few more curses than that, and I wasn’t much of a swearer.
“That wasn’t our only bump-in, either. There was another ball Mitch was at, and he approached me while I was pregnant. Then ... well, when I was single, my mom was babysitting one night so I could go out for drinks with friends, and I ran into Mitch at the bar. He claimed it was fate. He said, ‘Third time’s the charm.’”
“That line worked?”
I choked out a half cry, half laugh. “Not at first. I resisted. Wasn’t ready to date. But he got to me eventually.” I shrugged. “He was older, charming, a little cocky, and had that whole Maverick fromTop Gunenergy. But taller and younger than Tom Cruise, of course. He went so far as to take me out on his motorcycle for a ‘friend’ date. Gave me his jacket, aviators, with the wind in my hair.” I blew out my cheeks. “He was persistent. Never gave up until I said yes to dating and yes to marriage.”
Ryder let go of me and stood, dragging both hands through his hair.
“After we were married, he didn’t want me working, but at that time he’d convinced me he was being sweet, not controlling. And he’d promised I’d play again one day.” I shut my eyes, trying to wrap my head around how I’d fallen for it. “Was any of it ever real, do you think? Or was he always wearing a mask?”
“Maybe?” A question and an answer all in one. “About the guy you have feelings for now, though ...”
That pivot had me on my feet now, too, but before he could continue, Reed walked in and shared, “You’re not going to believe this. Trevor said he met Hobbs once. It was at the military ball in 2017, when Audrey was pregnant.”
And there went my stomach. Free-falling.
“And guess who introduced him to Hobbs?” Reed continued.
