Lord Sterling’s eyebrows went up. “Are you suggesting my son isn’temotionallysafe in his own home, Miss Clara?” His tone was deceptively calm, but I could sense that subtle undercurrent of threat there. This was not a man who took criticism well. I would have normally shrank back and retreated from that sort of tone automatically, but it was the condescending way he was looking at me that triggered another snap of anger.
“Someone—” I said, my voice breaking before I swallowed past the lump in my throat to get the rest of my words out, “Someone told Ozzie that he’s stupid. I asked you before if anything like that could be happening and you told me no, but Ozzie isn’t lying.”
Lord Sterling’s defensive posture relaxed then, which only made me angrier. He knew about this? Wouldhehave told his son that he was stupid? Why did that cause a huge wave of disappointment to crash over me?
“Dyslexia has nothing to do with stupidity,” I said, my voice shaking with fury now. It wasn’t just about Ozzie; it was all the kids overlooked and belittled for something beyond their control. How dare he make his kind, intelligent son feel less than he was? “Ozzie is very intelligent, actually,” I went on. “But what he lacks is confidence. Putting him down and telling him he’s stupid is absolutely counterproductive. Even if your aim is only academic success, knocking his confidence will not help, and is the absolute worst thing you should do if you care at all about his emotional well-being. I-I won’t stand for it, okay?”
Lord Sterling was actually smirking now. He had the temerity to quirk one side of his mouth up as he stared down at me and crossed his arms over his chest.
“You’ll not stand for it, will you?” he said, his voice sounding amused rather than angry.
“N-n-no, I won’t,” I said, my arms straight down by my sides and my hands clenched into tight fists. “You can’t treat him like that. It’s not fair. Y-y-you can’t…”
To my absolute horror, I could feel the back of my eyes start to sting. Oh my God, this was probably the most unprofessional moment of my career. But I was telling this man his son wasn’t emotionally safe, and he was smirking at me like it was some kind of joke.
I often felt powerless, and this was just another situation weighted against me. I didn’treallyhave any say here. Ozzie wasn’tmyson. I was just an employee. Lord Sterling didn’t have to take what I was saying seriously. He didn’t have to change his treatment of his son. There was literally nothing I could do.
“He just doesn’t deserve to be treated that way,” I said, my voice small. Back to weak, pathetic Clara. A wave of self-disgust hit me then. Ozzie was just another kid that I couldn’t protect, that I would fail.
“Clara?” Lord Sterling’s voice was soft now, the amusement from before completely gone. When I looked up at him, I saw he had uncrossed his arms, and he wasn’t smirking anymore. “Clara, hey. I’m sorry.”
I blinked in shock.I’m sorrywas not what I was expecting to hear.
“I absolutely take my son’s emotional well-being seriously. Ozzie’s last nanny was a fucking bitch. I didn’t know what she was saying to Ozzie for a long time and he was too embarrassed to tell me. It was actually you who prompted me to look into it. When I found out, I sacked her. No one speaks to my son that way, Clara. I promise you that I kept him safe.”
A wave of relief shot through me, and my tense stance relaxed. But as the adrenaline faded, the pounding in my ears changed to a low ringing, and a wave of nausea swept over me. I started to feel a bit faint.
Oh bugger.
When had I last eaten?
Whilst I was staying with Lily, I couldn’t make sandwiches at her flat, so I had to pop out to get lunch every day now. But this lunchtime, when I’d spotted Skinny Pete hovering around the newsagents, I simply didn’t have thecourage to go out and buy anything. Lily had made me take half of her tuna roll, but I was so worked up after seeing Skinny Pete that I couldn’t manage more than a couple of bites. And I didn’t feel comfortable eating any of the Sterlings’ food. I didn’t know if it was my place. My vision narrowed as I swayed on my feet.
“Clara?” Lord Sterling snapped, panic in his tone as he stepped closer to me. Then his large hands enclosed my upper arms to hold me upright which was enough of a trigger for another adrenaline surge. This close, I could smell his expensive aftershave mixed with his own clean, woodsy, masculine scent. His broad shoulders filled my field of vision completely, his muscular frame straining under the confines of his suit jacket.
It was all too much.
I wrenched away out of his grip.
“Shit,” he muttered under his breath. “It’s okay, Clara.”
He was holding his hands palms up now like he had the last time he scared me. It wasn’t fear of him hurting me that drove me away this time, though, more fear of what I would do with him that close. A wave of embarrassment hit me then, and I moved back to sit down heavily on the sofa behind me.
Bloody hell, I thought,this man must think I’m completely off my rocker.
“Clara, I’m sorry,” he said in that soft tone again. “I shouldn’t have put my hands on you, but it looked like you were going to pass out.”
“No, it, it’s fine, I’m fine”, I told him. “Sorry, I… er… I skipped lunch, so I’m just a bit off.”
I tucked my hair behind my ears and swiped away the tear I could feel on my cheek. What I really wanted to do was put my head between my knees to help this lightheadednesssettle, but I didn’t want to appear even weaker in front of this man.
Then something bizarre and almost wonderful happened. Lord Sterling walked over to me and sat on the coffee table in front of me so that he was at my level. It was a manoeuvre I would never believe possible from a man like him if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes.
“I appreciate you looking out for my son, Clara,” he said, and at his sincere tone I managed to raise my eyes from the carpet to meet his intense blue gaze. “I’m really fucking pleased that you’d protect him even against me, and if you ever haveanymore concerns I want you to know you can tell me. Understood?”
I nodded woodenly, not trusting myself to speak.
“Now that we’ve got that out of the way, I want to know why the fuck you haven’t eaten lunch and what the fuck you’re playing at not eating with Ozzie?”
