Once he’d got his breath back, Noah took a swig of water.
“I’ll be okay,” Noah replied gruffly. “I’m still playing well, aren’t I?”
“Have you not had any success with Carmine?”
“He’s got some family issues.”
Udo stared at him.
“Things haven’t been plain sailing for me and Steven,” he said. “We had to learn to communicate with each other pretty early on.”
That was something he and Carmine were failing at. Noah stopped his treadmill.
“I can’t parade people into Malcolm’s life,” he said. “He is my responsibility. Nobody else’s.”
“What if Carmine had a child?”
“What are you talking about?”
Udo looked around. They were alone.
“Would you expect Jonas to be okay if Adam didn’t allow him to be part of Olive’s life? To sit on the sidelines and watch. Maybe grab some time together when all Adam’s other commitments were fulfilled.”
“That’s different.”
“Not in the slightest.”
Noah sighed. “If you’re trying to tell me something, I’d appreciate if you’d come out with it?”
“Take the jump, Noah. The world isn’t full of endless opportunities when it comes to finding decent men.”
“I think it’s too late for me and Carmine.”
Udo slowed his machine down to walking pace.
“You’re going to give up? Just like that?”
“I’m not giving up but how hard does it have to be?”
“Bloody hell, Noah,” Udo said. “It’s always tough. Especially at the beginning.”
A flash of shame burnt through Noah. No one had had a worse start to a relationship than Udo and Steven. They became headline news before they’d even worked out what they wanted. His and Carmine’s situation was child’s play in comparison.
“I can’t force him to want to be with me.”
Udo fiddled with the control pad and let the machine grind to a slow halt. “I don’t believe I’m hearing this. He’s really into you and I think you feel the same.”
“I have to let him come to me,” Noah explained. “He’s got bigger things on his mind.”
They walked to the door together.
“So what are you doing this afternoon to take your mind off things?” Udo asked.
“Going to see how the house is coming on.”
“And you’re dead set on selling?”
Noah nodded. “It’s too soon to splash my cash on a house. I need to do this charity thing. For my parents and my brother.”
