Blake leans against the counter, his arms crossed over his chest as if to keep himself from moving. Conflict swirls in his eyes as he searches my face, no doubt seeing every trace of evidence of my crying. His muscles go taut again. “They are out looking for Hudson so he can be handed over to the police. The cops and school board have proved useless so far, so the guys figured they could patrol the area, be extra eyes on campus.”
I shift on my feet. “Did you and Levi make them do that?”
“No onemadethem do anything. It was their idea.” Blake instinctively steps forward but catches himself before he reaches me, like him coming any closer could set me off. “They would do anything for you. They’re crazy about you—just like me.”
He winks at that last part, trying to make me smile. It doesn’t work.
“They shouldn’t be putting themselves in danger like that,” I say. “Even if it doesn’t get to a fight, they could utilize this time so much better by studying or doing extra practice for your next game.”
Blake shakes his head with a sigh. “You have to stop doing that.”
“Doing what?”
“Acting like you are not worth the effort, or the affection, or anything else that rattles on in that beautiful brain of yours,” Blake says, that muscle in his jaw ticking with anger. But I know his anger is not directed at me. Not really. “You’re fucking amazing. You are kind, smart, and thoughtful. You made that cake for Raf’s birthday even though we were all too wrapped up in game prep to remember it. You took the time and effort to perfect a high-protein healthy snack and make sure we’re never out of it. You might think we don’t notice those things, but we do. Your big heart isn’t lost on any of us, Sunshine. Please, let us do something for you for once.”
My cheeks are wet and I know the tears are streaming again, but I don’t care. Blake is right; I had no idea they kept track of me, of the little things I do for them. Sure, they have always thanked me for baking them things and they look genuinely happy to see me whenever I come around, but I think I’ve always figured that was because I am Levi’s sister, not because I’m me.
Blake opens his arms and I walk straight into them, craving the warm comfort of his chest and the safety of his arms.
“I’m so sorry, Blake,” I sob. “For everything. For not being more careful and facing him alone, for scaring you, for?—”
“You’re still here with me.” His lips brush over the top of my head as he cradles me deeper into his chest, and I wonder if his words are more for me or him. “You’re still here with me, Alexis. That’s all that matters.”
I let him hold me until my feet go numb and my knees threaten to give way.
He lifts me so I can sit on the counter, as close to him as possible, and watch him make a massive amount of spaghetti from a recipe I don’t recognize but I’m too tired to question.Instead, I taste and give pointers on the sauce and set the table for the guys to help themselves when they come back.
“My mom texted. She and Dad will be here tonight,” I say as I busy myself with folding napkins. “I should probably go back to my dorm.”
“You need to do whatever you feel is right.” Blake puts the saucepan on a lower heat to keep it from burning. “If you want to go home, I’ll take you there. But if you feel safer here, then you should stay, no matter what they might want you to do.”
Alissa’s words come to mind.To live your life to the fullest you have to learn to be selfish.
It’s funny how two people can say such similar things at such different times. Then again Blake and Alissa are more similar than they are willing to admit, and I am a predictable people-pleaser. But still.
I know what I want, what Ineedat this moment.
“In that case, I’d love to stay for a bit longer. If you’re not sick of me yet.”
Blake turns around, wrapping his arms around my waist before kissing me. “Never. You are my home. I could spend eternity at your side and it would still not be enough.”
“Are you paraphrasingTwilight?” I raise a brow.
Blake laughs. “Come on, Sunshine. I’m trying to be romantic here. Give me a break.”
“Fine,” I bunch the fabric of his maroon shirt in my fist and pull him closer until our lips are nearly brushing. “Let’s start with forever, Blakey-bear.”
Chapter 35
Blake
Right.Left. Right. Left.
The blades underneath my feet cut the ice as I glide forward, bulldozing my way through the teammates who protect the goal. They don’t stand a chance.
Within seconds the puck hits the net and my team erupts in loud cheers and whistles, clapping my hand as I circle back to our side. On instinct I look out into the stands in search of my Sunshine’s lovely face, only to remember she’s not here.
We decided she should sit these things out for a while and use the time to unwind, go to therapy sessions or catch up with her parents instead. Nora and Bill have been staying in a motel nearby, and from what I’ve heard from Alissa, they have been a real nuisance to the school board and administration, hounding them for answers and threatening to sue. As if I could not adore them any more.
