Hey, quick question
Settling back in her chair, she closed her eyes.Yoga breath. In-2-3, out-2-3.She glanced at the clock. She was surprised he was already home. She picked up her phone, tapping out a response.
Hit me
I'll answer as quickly as I can before I complain about this bullshit meeting
Several minutes went by before the phone buzzed again from its silicon mat.
Oh perfect
I can’t wait
But first
What the fuck is this???
"Hey, have you talked to that guy you met at last year’s winter solstice recently?”
Ris turned distractedly to Dynah, who had sauntered over to lean against her desk, sipping from her water bottle with a faraway, fixed expression. Ris knew that look. That was a classicDynah has been single for twelve minutes and is having an existential crisislook.
“The vampire? You know, with the ear?"
From her desk, the phone buzzed again, an irritating clanging against the aluminum. In her peripheral vision, she could see that an image had popped up, but she didn't want to let her friend off the hook that easily.
"That was more like two years ago. Why, Dy? Why would you even be asking about him? He was a weirdo! I am not permitting you to start dating my castoffs. I didn't give them a second chance for a reason."
Dynah huffed, flapping her arms like a goose. "That issounfair! You are way pickier than me!" Dynah's wide eyes glanced down to Ris's phone, practically bugging out of her skull. "Is – is that a . . ." She trailed off, gasping.
Ris snatched up the phone, squinting her eyes at the photo he had sent. In the foreground was a glass bottle with a distinctive black label. The diamond-shaped cap told her what it was immediately. The araneaen venom she had purchased at the Makers’ Mart with Silva.
Their younger friend had gone on and on about the witch whose table she visited every month, insisting that her hair had never been shinier, her skin had never been softer, and that everything smelled like delicate rose petals. Silva had sighed dreamily at the mere thought. Ris had no particular interest in smelling like a bouquet of flowers, but whathadcaught her eye at the witch’s table was the extremely expensive bottle of ointment made with rare araneaen venom, sitting like a crown jewel on acrylic cubes. She had purchased the medium strength bottle, mumbling when its selection necessitated the purchase of an additional bottle of shampoo and tub of body butter just to be allowed the opportunity.
"This had better be worth it," she had grumbled to Silva as they left the table, the latter waving gaily over her shoulder. "Because otherwise, that feels like a racket. How do you think they even get this?"
Ainsley had found the bottle. Ris snorted in laughter, prepared to tap out her response, when she took a better look, squinting. The bottle was there in the foreground of the frame. But there in the background, slightly out of focus, was the unmistakable rigid, watermelon-colored shape of his erection. She slammed the phone face down onto its mat, slapping her hand over her mouth.
"Is that a bottle of venom stuff?" Dynah stage whispered, looking scandalized.
Ris closed her eyes.Oh, thank fuck she didn't see."Yeah, it is. I bought it with Silva a few weeks ago. Ainsley just found it on my dresser. Look, I gotta call him back, but no. Absolutely not, Dy. I'm not giving you the number for that fucking vampire with the ear. He was a douchebag and he'll convince you to buy him a new car and then take off in the middle of the night with his undead wife. No. End of conversation."
Powering down her laptop, she decided to take a page from Silva's book that afternoon.And if anyone wants to know where you are, you got lost trying to make the math work from recruiting.
The condo was silent as she swung open the door. Ris paused, sticking her head in and glancing around, listening. Nothing.
"Babe? You're not a corpse in here, are you?" In truth, she had no idea what the Araneaen venom would actually do. She’d not used it immediately upon purchasing, and it had been shuffled around her bedroom to several different locations, winding upforgotten on the dresser, which is where he must've found it. "Ains?"
The sound that came from the bedroom was that of some sort of mad, yodeling beast. She was giggling before she'd even turned around to close and lock the door.
"Ainsley, you sound ri-di-cu-lous." The singsong of her voice reverberated down the hallway, cutting off when she reached the bedroom door.
"Look away," he moaned. "I'm hideous."
Ris approached the bed with her mouth hanging open. "Holy shit." She had never seen his erection look as it did right then. "Ains, how much did youuse?!"
The meat of his shaft was swollen, completely engorged, riddled with veins that were standing out in relief. Squinting, she tried to tell if any of them were pulsing. She couldn't ascertain if his cock actually looked larger than normal or if it was just the increased tumescence that was making it curve up his belly like a third arm. His skin looked stretched taut, the green pulled shiny, fading to a pink that was darker than normal, the seam splitting the fat mushroom head, nearly fuchsia. He was bare ass naked, sitting on what was possibly every towel from her cupboard.
"Look. Mistakes were made. We can all own that. But right now, what I need from you is a lot less judgment and a lot more cooperation in the form of taking off your pants."
