I suck in a ragged breath, trying to remind myself that it’s okay. It’s okay to be seen like this, to let someone know how much you love them and want them. My heart softens as I realize that it reallyisokay, whatever he wants to do. I thought this apartment was a gesture for him—and it is—but it’s also a gesture for myself. It’s the first time in forever that I’ve put myself out there, that I’ve had the courage to openly ask for what I want.
And that’s him. It’s taken me long enough to recognize it, but now I know… it’s always been him.
“Cat—” He shakes his head, taking a step closer. “What is this place?”
I swallow. “Um, I got it… for us.”
“When did you do this?”
I scratch my arm, trying not to crawl out of my skin at how exposed I feel. This is definitely going to take some practice. “Today.”
“So… before you knew that we would get back together?”
I nod.
“But what if things hadn’t worked out?”
“Well, I’m trying to practice trusting things a bit more.”
“Things like… me?”
“Yeah. Andus. And, hopefully, our future together.”
He stares at me, dumbstruck, and I’m so close to crying it’s ridiculous. Then he steps forward and gathers me into his arms, tucking me right into that safe spot. And I’ve never felt more like I’m home.
“This is everything, baby,” he says into my hair. “This is—” His voice cracks and I squeeze him tighter. “I can’t wait to live here with you.”
Euphoria rises inside me, bursting like fireworks in my chest; so bright it’s almost blinding.Thisis why you do it—why you keep taking the risk and putting yourself out there. Because when something works out, it’s worth every past hurt you’ve endured.
His eyes are shining when we draw apart, but that’s nothing compared to the tears streaming down my face. He wipes them away with a smile.
“Happy tears?”
I nod, sniffling. It’s like I’ve opened some kind of floodgate now and the tears just won’t stop coming. But weirdly, I’m okay with that.
He turns to gaze at our new space. “I might sell my place.”
“Wait—youownthat apartment?”
“Uh-huh.” His mouth twists with amusement. “Remember when you thought I was broke?”
“Shut up.” I thump him on the chest.
He chuckles. “I bought it with the money I made from selling my app.”
“Yes!” I say, remembering. “What was that?”
“Just this silly cocktail app I designed. I got a pretty penny for it, which is how I bought my little place, but now… I want to be here with you.” He takes my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. “Show me around. Show me what you imagine.”
“Okay.” I lead him to the living room and show him where I thought we could put a piano, where I want his pictures to hang, where we could put the stereo so we can dance to eighties music together. The whole time I’m talking, he’s beaming at me, just pure joy, and my heart feels like it will overflow.
“And what about this room?” He gestures to the bigger bedroom. I explain that that will be our room, then I show him the smaller room, where I thought I could do my sewing. I show him where he could have a desk, too, for his business.
“And…” I take a deep breath, treading carefully. “I’m not pressuring you, or anything. But if things ever change with Amber… there would be room for a bed, too.”
He shakes his head, and for a second I think I’ve overstepped. But he lifts my hand to his mouth, kissing it softly. “Thank you. Because I’ve been thinking, and you were right. I have a right to see her and I’m going to fight for that. I’m going to take Nikki to court.”
I feel a flash of surprise. “I thought you were worried about how that would affect Amber?”
