“Insulting? No, not when I couldn’t care less about a wife, when she is only the means to get an heir and fulfill my obligations. You I care about. I want you to be part of my life.”
She glared at him, but her anger was slipping away. God, he knew just what to say to tug on the strings of her heart. She loved him. What he wanted was what she wanted, to be a part of his life. His callousness about a wife was…well, she would pity his wife—if that wife wasn’t herself. She wasn’t giving up. She had five months until spring to become necessary to him, to make him more than care about her, to make him love her so much that he would defy the society that said a prince couldn’t marry a commoner, as he thought her to be. Let him be surprised later to find she was his social equal.
She reached out a hand to touch his cheek, and he caught it, kissing the palm. “I’m sorry,” she offered softly. “I forget you have your obligations. But when my first child comes along, Dimitri, I intend to be married. If not to you, then to someone else.”
“No.”
“No?”
“No!” he said with finality, drawing her tightly to him. “You aren’t marrying, ever.”
Katherine said nothing to such fierce possessiveness. She just smiled, glad now that she hadn’t told him that she was already expecting her first child, though he would be able to figure that out for himself very shortly. And when he did, let him remember what she had said, that shewouldhave a husband, one way or another. A nice bluff, but of course he wouldn’t know that.
Chapter Thirty-six
The ball gown was exquisite, like nothing Katherine would ever have chosen for herself. A dark, lustrous turquoise satin, with a white lace insert in the bodice and hundreds of pearls running in streamers down the bell-like skirt. It was flamboyant, a deeply scooped neckline ending off the shoulders, the lace draping over little puffed sleeves. It wasn’t Katherine. She felt like a fairy princess wearing it.
Her hair had been parted in the middle and pulled back sleekly to side ringlets in the current style, with pearl ornaments attached. Every accessory had been included: the long white gloves, the satin shoes in the same shimmering turquoise, even a white lace fan to dangle from her wrist. And Dimitri had come in earlier to hand her a jewelry case containing the pearl-and-diamond necklace, earrings, and ring she now wore, as well as another collection in sapphires and emeralds, so that she would have a choice, he said. Trifles, he called them. He said the same of her winter wardrobe. Several gowns had arrived today along with the ball gown, the rest to be delivered soon.
He was treating her like a mistress already, she realized, but the thought didn’t disturb her. It wouldn’t be long before none of the clothes he had ordered for her would fit, and then she would be amused to see how he would treat her. She turned around before the full-length mirror, taking particular notice of her waistline. It was still as slim as ever, and in that she was fortunate, being three and a half months along. Only her breasts had filled out a little, but again, nothing noticeable yet, nothing to alert Dimitri that he would soon have one of the children he claimed he would cherish.
Oh, you are in for a surprise, my prince. Soon you will know why my sentiments have changed so drastically.
Of course she wouldn’t be so blasé about her situation if she were home in England. That would be a different story entirely. But as long as she was here, why couldn’t she enjoy herself for the time being? After all, she no longer had to worry about getting pregnant.
Katherine smiled to herself, glancing about her new bedroom once more before she left it. Once again she had been given the room that would normally belong to the lady of the house, and it was pure luxury in every detail. But she had not slept here last night. Her smile widened. She doubted she would sleep here tonight either.
Oh, it had been heaven, sheer heaven, spending the whole night with Dimitri, sleeping in his arms and waking to find him still beside her. And to be greeted by one of his devastating smiles before she had even cleared the sleep from her eyes, and a kiss, which led to other things… She had no doubt that she had made the right choice. She was happy. That was all that mattered for now.
He was waiting for her at the bottom of the stairs, holding out a magnificent white ermine cloak lined in white satin, which he draped around her shoulders before handing her the matching muff.
“You’re spoiling me, Dimitri.”
“That is the idea, little one,” he replied quite seriously, his smile warm, his eyes dark in appreciation of the picture she presented.
He was resplendent himself in another uniform, this jacket white, with heavy gold epaulets on his shoulders, gold-embroidered collar, and the blue cordon of the Order of St. Andrew draped across his chest, the medal worn for no reason other than to impress Katherine. Yet Dimitri was the one impressed, and he couldn’t take his eyes off her as he helped her out to the carriage and as they drove the few blocks to the ball he was taking her to.
She was exquisite in her finery, and he was vividly reminded of the portrait Anastasia had painted of her, which now hung in his study and which caused him such unease every time he looked at it. No one was going to mistake this woman for a servant, actress, or whatever she was—not looking like this. Nor would he have formed his conception of her status if he had first seen her like this, which made him realize that it was no more than clothes and circumstances that had convinced him she was not who she claimed to be. And what if he was wrong? A tight knot of misgiving formed in his belly. No, he couldn’t be. But perhaps it wasn’t such a good idea to take Katherine to such a large gathering this first time she was appearing in public.
He had wanted to please her, to show her off, to do as Vasili had suggested and treat her like a lady instead of keeping her hidden behind closed doors. But suddenly he was afraid to share her. Suddenly he wanted to keep her locked away all for himself.
“I assume you will introduce me to people, Dimitri. So tell me, who am I to be?”
Had she read his thoughts? “Who you say you are—Katherine St. John.”
“That isn’t exactly how I would put it, but if that is how you intend to introduce me, then I suppose it wouldn’t be polite to correct you.”
She was teasing him. Why was she teasing him, and about her identity, of all things? “Katya, are you sure you wish to go to this affair?”
“And not show off this divine gown? Why, it’s been ages since my last ball. Of course I want to go.”
There she was again, dropping little tidbits about her life that couldn’t possibly be true, yet she said such things spontaneously, without thought, without reason, just in the natural course of a conversation. The carriage stopped before he could make up his mind whether to disappoint her and take her home or hope for the best. Knowing Katherine’s outspokenness, she was bound to step on a few toes tonight, and speculation about her was going to run rampant. What if she lost her temper here?
“You do know how… I mean, you wouldn’t cause—”
“What are you worried about, Dimitri?” Katherine grinned at him, having an idea what was suddenly bothering him.
“It’s nothing,” he replied evasively, lifting her down to the ground. “Come along. I don’t want you catching cold out here.”
