“What about shifters who turn into animals lots of people think are hideous and disgusting?” Natalie put in. “Spider shifters and vulture shifters and rat shifters. Should they hide themselves away?”
“There’s nothing wrong with spiders and vultures and rats,” Carter retorted. “Nobody should hide their true nature because of bigots. But I’m not a perfectly fine animal that some people have a stupid prejudice against. I’m damaged. I’mwrong.”
Roland gazed at him with his deep brown eyes. “Carter, we’re all damaged here.”
Carter couldn’t argue with that. All the men had been kidnapped and experimented on, just like he had, forcibly given beasts they couldn’t control and powers they didn’t understand. Roland was still grieving the death of a woman whose name he’d never known, who’d given her life saving his. Natalie hadn’t been victimized in the same way, but she’d endured enough to break most people.
Maybe he’d been a little self-centered, obsessing over his own problems and blowing them up to be bigger than anyone else’s. Just a little.
Fen slipped her hand into his. “Remember how you talked to me about having ADHD? You didn’t say ‘I’m damaged and wrong and so are you and we should never ever tell anyone.’ You said it was how we were and no one should call us names about it, and there were things we could do about it. You weren’t ashamed, and that made me think maybe I shouldn’t be either.”
“Of course you shouldn’t!” Carter exclaimed automatically.
“Then neither should you,” she said. “About anything.”
He searched her face, but could see nothing but acceptance and sympathy. There was no disgust. No horror. No rejection.
And when he examined all of the Defenders in turn, he saw none of that in their eyes too.
“I think maybe I made a bigger deal of this than I should have,” Carter mumbled at last.
Merlin laughed, sprang forward, and clapped him on the back. “It’s okay. I refused to tell anyone about my power for ages.”
“So did I,” said Ransom.
“Me too,” said Pete.
“I ditched everyone I knew and ran away because of something I was too scared to tell them,” Natalie pointed out. “So you’re in good company.”
From the ground, Roland said, “Let’s continue this conversation on the boat. I’m sure we’d all like to get back home as soon as we can. And we need to talk about what Balin and Eunice said as a team. I mean, as a team and Carter.”
Carter looked at the Defenders. These were the people who’d come to his defense, accepted him exactly as he was, invited him to join them, and kept on welcoming him no matter how many times he refused to admit that he was one of them. He’d thought he couldn’t bear to join a team that would reject him in horror if they ever saw the monster that lurked beneath his skin. But they had seen it, and they hadn’t rejected him.
“As a team, period,” Carter said. “If the invitation to join is still open.”
“Of course it is,” said Roland.
“Not full-time,” he added hastily. “I still have a company to run. But part-time… If you’ll take me on part-time…”
“Part-time counts,” said Roland. “Welcome to the Defenders, Carter.”
The irrepressible Merlin added, “Hope you survive!”
To Carter’s astonishment, the Defenders applauded. They were joined by vigorous splashing. Norris, still a Dunkleosteus, had his head poking out of the swamp and was slapping his fins against the water’s surface.
“Thanks, Norris. Have you been there the whole time?” Carter asked.
Norris flapped a fin.
“He’s been watching and munching popcorn,” Natalie said with a grin. “Well, not literal popcorn. But he’s been tossing fish and shrimp into his mouth with his fins.”
Fen approached him. “Norris, can you change back?”
Norris gave a shake of his head. Since he didn’t exactly have a neck, that required him to shake his entire body. She jumped back from the wave of swamp water that washed the beach.
“Uh-oh,” muttered Carter. “I was hoping Eunice was bluffing, and her control over our shift forms stopped when she left—sheisgone, isn’t she?”
“She’s gone,” said Ransom. Carter didn’t ask him if he was sure. That was the thing about Ransom: heknew.
