I narrow my eyes and cross my arms. “So your sudden coolness has nothing to do with the fact that you kissed me last week?”
He looks tiredly out the window, sighing. “No, Margot. I don’t understand you, really. You reject my advances… but still you expect me to treat you like a friend, as opposed to a nosy fucking reporter.” He peers at me. “Which you are, by the way.” He stands up suddenly, looking fierce. “That’s what you want, isn’t it? To be my friend?”
“Yes.” I uncross my arms and sit forward, leaning my elbows on my knees. “Stellan…” When he looks over at me, I take a steadying breath. “You realize that I’m just trying to keep us both safe, right? I’m attracted to you. You are attracted to me. And that would be good enough if you were anyone else. But… you’re not. You’re the crown prince of fucking Denmark.”
Stellan looks at me, his ice blue eyes threatening to pierce me through to the core. “You don’t think I know that? You don’t think I’m aware of that every fucking second of every single day? No one will let me forget it.”
I falter. He seems to be in pain. Or maybe it’s just a weariness that comes with carrying the burden of being the prince. I don’t know which.
“I’m sorry, Stellan. I really am.” Sitting back in the wooden chair, I watch him recompose his facial expression. He wipes away all the traces of sadness. What’s left is a face I recognize all too well.
He looks remote. Withdrawn. Untouchable.
My fingers itch with the need to touch him, to tell him that things will be okay. Even though I know that saying that might just be a pretty, comforting lie.
I have less control over this situation than anybody else, honestly.
He turns to me, changing the subject as if the entire conversation before now simply never happened. “Do you want to go for a walk? Maybe we could go down by the shoreline. There is a little restaurant there that I always patronize whenever I am here.”
“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather stay here and talk some more?” I ask.
He pins me with his gaze. “I couldn’t be more certain.”He heads to the hallway in the back, leaving me to bite my lip and wonder what exactly is going on in his head. Is he still upset about the other night?
Or is he really just switching tracks like he changed subjects?
Stellan reappears, zipping a light raincoat up over his dark wool sweater. He eyes me in my dark leather jacket, short black skirt, and neon pink tights. “Are you going to be warm enough?”
I scowl at his question. “I’m fine.”
“Okay.” He shrugs. “Come on, then.”
He strides out of the room and through the kitchen, making me scurry to keep up with him. He’s out of the door and into the cool air in seconds. I follow, shivering a little at the shock of going from the warmth of the house out into the chilly atmosphere.
Stellan turns back and sees me shiver. His eyes narrow. “I told you.”
I grit my teeth and stick my hands in my pockets. “It’s fine. Keep leading the way, like you always do.”
He squints at me, then casts a look around the cobblestone street we are on. “Yeah, all right. Whatever that means. Come on, will you?”
I start marching downhill and Stellan falls in beside me. His eyes are on the horizon as we walk. I look at the green grass and the brown shoreline, only a quarter of a mile away. They are fitted so snugly with the blue-black ocean, each affecting the other’s shaping.
At length, I scrunch my face up and look at him. “So is this how it usually works? You do five intense days of hand shaking and autograph signing, then you are allowed to jet off to one of the royal family’s getaways for the weekend?”
He sighs. “Ja, more or less. Usually Erik is with me when I escape.”
I nod slowly. “And where is he this time?”
His shoulders lift in a shrug. “No idea. He said he had something he wanted to do. I didn’t press him for details. Besides… it’s nice to be alone once in a while.”
I look at him oddly. “You’re not alone, Stellan. You’re with me.” I scrunch up my nose. “I guess you are used to having a staff at your beck and call, Erik reminding you of appointments, a hundred people always wanting to shake hands with you. I’m starting to think that you have no real idea of what being alone is like.”
He looks unamused. “Maybe I don’t. Or maybe this weekend is about me, inviting you into my solitude.”
My eyebrows lift. “Oh. I hadn’t thought of that.”
He lifts his head, nodding to a building in the distance. “I want to stop in there for a second. Wait for me.”
Stellan jogs off toward it, leaving me alone to think about what he said. My mouth twists. I guess there is a wealth of things I don’t understand about his life, just the same way as he can’t possibly fathom every single thing about mine.
