Benji wanted to cry; it was so overwhelming. The kind of good that was so intense he didn’t know whether to lean in or flinch away from it. But Noah was holding him in place, one hand on his tailbone and one handinsidehim in a way nobody had ever been before.
Noah’s hand shifted inside Benji, thrusting slowly in and out. His knuckles tugged again on Benji’s hole, but from the inside this time.
Benji came so hard he blacked out. When he woke up, his hole was empty, and Noah was smoothing a cloth down his sweaty chest.
Benji watched him work, all of him hazy and shaky and raw. He felt like Noah had opened his ribcage and touched his beatingheart. And here he was, putting Benji back together with those deft, sure hands.
It was dawn when Benji awoke again. Benji stared at the curtains, the morning sun shining through the gap. It was warm, the sheets tangled around one foot and nothing else.
Noah was sitting on the bed beside him. He was fully dressed, wearing a tank top and a pair of shorts that were so soft Benji once spent a whole evening rubbing them without noticing.
“Whoa,” Benji slurred. “Tank Top Noah. Never seen him before.”
Noah looked down at his tank top in surprise, like he hadn’t even noticed he was wearing it.
“If you want to go sleeveless, you’re usually in the fancy sports shirts,” Benji continued, plucking at the hem. “With the special fabric and… stuff.”
“I wear tank tops in summer,” Noah said. “You just haven’t seen it yet.”
Benji hummed, rolling over onto his back. His hole throbbed, but it was a good ache. The kind of ache he’d had a lot since he’d met Noah.
Noah ran a hand over his bare chest. “How do you feel?”
“Good,” Benji said. His head was still slow and syrupy, his limbs loose. He wiggled slowly against the sheets, feeling his hole gape. “Could probably take you without any prep. Slide right in.”
Noah’s eyes darkened. His hand spasmed on Benji’s chest, his thumb brushing Benji’s nipple tantalizingly.
Then he sat back. “I’ll keep that in mind. For now, I got you something.”
“You already got me a resort in Bali,” Benji reminded him.
“I didn’t get it for you.” Noah grinned. “Unless you want me to.”
“No,” Benji blurted. “Donotbuy me a resort, Noah. Hard line.”
“Got it,” Noah said softly. His smile flickered, like he was reminding himself of something. Then he reached over and set a velvet box on Benji’s chest.
Benji sat up, heart thudding. The velvet box fell into his naked lap. It was long and flat, Benji noticed with equal parts relief and disappointment. Not the right shape for a ring.
“This isn’t a proposal,” Benji joked. “Right?”
Another strange look passed over Noah’s face, so fast Benji thought he might have imagined it.
“No,” Noah said. “No proposal. I just thought you might like it.”
Benji rubbed the velvet, marveling. Then he flipped open the box, and his breath whooshed out of him.
A collar gleamed dully against the dark lining. It was sleek black leather, as soft as butter. A metal ring sat in the middle of the collar, curved in the shape of a heart.
Benji swallowed over a thick throat. He suddenly imagined how that would have felt if he were wearing the collar, and a lightheaded rush washed over him.
“Oh,” he said thinly. “Shit.”
He’d never worn a collar before. He couldn’t help but think of all the stuff he’d read online during late-night Google searches, about collars and doms and subs andcommitment.
It’s because you won’t say yes to marrying him, Benji’s mind whispered.He’s trying to keep you.
Somehow, this was infinitely less terrifying than marriage. Somehow this collar made Benji desperate, his naked neck prickling with want.
