I tried to act unbothered at Lola’s dorm, showing River that two could play at that game. Not only did I play the game, but I got a reaction out of him, which I never thought I’d be able to do. It was a small reward for the bullshit he was putting me through.
There was a reckless part of me that wanted to test it. I wanted to testhim. And ironically, it was a side of me that only ever came out when I waswithhim.
After a moment of reflection, Anna’s eyes softened. “I’m not trying to be a bitch, okay? I’m trying to save you from the disappointment, but also the strain it puts on you. You know your body doesn’t handle stress the way others do.”
An uneasy silence hung in the air. “Your body doesn’t handle stress the way others do.”As if I wasn’t aware and doing everything I could to prevent it. The irony was she didn't realize she was often part of the issue.
Noticing my discomfort, she gave a sympathetic frown. “You’ve been doing good, and I’ll be damned if I let you let anyone undo that. I don’t want to seethathappen again if we can avoid it. I don’t want to be that scared again.”
A tension spread across the back of my neck. “I know.”
Anna parted her lips to speak, but paused when Millie stirred in her arms. No doubt struggling to continue to carry her, she picked up her bag and headed for the door.
“Be careful, Alex.”
“I’m good,” I insisted as I tugged on a strand of my hair. “Look, it’s all intact. No pulling it out.”
Her lips pursed, not fully convinced. “So you keep saying.”
You know what they say: if you say it aloud enough times, you’ll eventually believe it.
Three weeks later, biology had been getting increasingly worse. I had begun to think there was something wrong with me because the class average on the last test was seventy-five percent. Flip the number around and subtract fifteen, and there you have what I scored.
Eli and Javier were saints for trying to help me. It was the first step to getting the bio degree my parents prayed I’d achieve so that I could get into med school, but if med school was anything like this, I could kiss that degree goodbye.
Except I couldn’t, because Mom and Dad would never let me live that down. My sister was the underachiever in their eyes, so I had to be the one they could brag about. Nonnegotiable.
After what felt like the most unproductive tutoring session ever, I was ready to slip into the hot bath and relax for the rest of the night. Instead, I came home to find the apartment atrocious.
I was getting quite used to coming back to crumbs all over the couch and empty cans on the coffee table, but some things were simply too far. What would entice someone to see a garbage can without a bag in it, and instead of putting one inside like any normal human, dump the leftover food into the can itself?
I picked up before getting changed to work on the project at Lola’s again. It had been three weeks since we last touched it together, but we’d still kept up on research on our own.
I was sweeping the floor when I felt a buzz in my pocket, and I sucked in a breath as I braced myself for whoever was calling. If it were Annabelle, it could be her needing a last-minute babysitter for Millie. My friend Rory could be calling, and if he was, it meant he needed something since that was the only time I ever heard from him. If the screen read Mom or Dad, I was about to get an earful for going over a week without calling. If it were River—no, it wouldn’t be River.
The winner was Rory.
I put the phone on speaker, tossed it on the couch, and continued sweeping. “Hey, Rory.”
Laughter sounded through the phone, one Rory’s and the other someone else’s. Then, his voice was close. “Alex, I need a favor.”
Shocker. “What is it?”
“Okay, so—” I heard shuffling, and then his voice went distant. “Dude, shush! I’m talking to Alex!” He came back to the speaker and chuckled his words out. “Andrew and I are stuck at the movies with no ride back to campus.”
Already knowing the question, I glanced at the clock. I was supposed to be at Lola’s for one, and it was thirty minutes till. “I have somewhere to be soon.”
“But we don’t have a ride back. How else will we get home?” Rory asked sharply.
“How did you get there?”
“Uber.”
“So, Uber back,” I drawled.
“Please, Alex? I already spent a fortune buying popcorn and candy, and I don’t want to pay for a ride back.”
“Alright,” I said after a beat. “I’m leaving now.”
