The bed creaked as he swung his legs to the side of the bed I was on, the duvet draping over him from waist down. He smirked. "How's the floor?"
"Piss off," I grumbled and shot a glare his way.
My attitude didn't faze him, it never really did. “Do you need help?”
“I’ve got it.” I began to undo my leg from the jail they were encased in with frustration. Once I had successfully removed my leg from the sheets, I climbed back on top of the bed and covered my lap with them.
I didn’t believe I had low self-esteem when it came to my appearance. I never felt ugly, but I wouldn’t have called myself a super model either. The only thing I wished for was to be a little taller. I was average height for a male, but I had a dream of being the height of an average basketball player. It simply appealed to me.
I had been in just underwear in front of my siblings, my friends, and even my classmates. In middle school gym class we had to change in front of each other in the boys’ locker room and it never phased me. I didn’t pay much attention to it.
However, I was currently feeling self-conscious and exposed. I had been embarrassed about a lot of shit, but not my body. I couldn’t explain why I suddenly felt so vulnerable in front of him.
Javi was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, so he had a lot more fabric on than I did. I could only imagine how fit he looked under that shirt. He probably had perfectly toned abs and firm chest, the kind that was perfect to fall asleep on. I had never seen him work out, but I was still convinced that was what was under his shirt. This was the guy who excelled at everything without an ounce of effort, of course he had to have the body to go along with it.
I cleared my throat. "Where are my clothes?"
His body moved closer to mine. "You mean your costume? In the washing machine.”
"Why?"
“You puked on yourself last night.”
"I never asked you to do that," I said sternly.
Javier’s lips parted and shut a couple of times before he spoke. “I didn’t want to, but I did not want you to sleep like that.”
"Okay, but did you have to take my costume off?" I asked harshly as my nostrils flared.
"How else was I supposed to put it in the washing machine?" he asked carefully.
"Fuck, I don't know." I buried my head in my palms, frustrated with both myself and the world for making me feel so shitty this morning. "Goddammit, Javi."
"I'm sorry?" His apology came out in the form of a question. He hadn’t done a thing wrong, yet here he was still trying to be compassionate. He then repeated in a more sincere tone, "I am sorry."
Of course I didn’t want him to leave me in my clothes with chunks of processed food scattered all over them. I was taking my own anger out on him even though he had been nothing but great to me. I didn’t mean to be a dick, but I struggled not to be.
I took a couple of deep breaths to both calm myself down and help with overwhelming nausea. "No, you're fine. It's me, I'm the problem."
It was quiet again. The faint sound of the revving up of a lawn mower filled the room from a neighborhood beginning to cut their grass. Damn, it was seven in the morning. Why did people feel the need to start their day so early?
“I liked it, by the way,” Javi said. “Your costume.”
“Really? You don’t think I looked dumb.”
I bit my lip to suppress the smile I felt forcing its way on my face.
“Of course not. I think you look good in everything you wear.”
He says shit like that like it doesn’t knock the breath out of me every time.
“There’s water on the nightstand that you need to drink. I can grab medicine from downstairs if you need it,” he said as he chewed on his fingernail. “How do you feel? If I was as wasted as you were last night, I would be hungover for days.”
Javier was so close to me that if I moved even the slightest bit our shoulders would collide. He wasn’t that close initially and I didn’t know if it was he or I who moved closer. Though, I didn’t mind. It was comforting in a way.
“My head doesn’t hurt, I’m just really nauseous. I’ll take the water,” I said to which he replied with a nod. He reached to the nightstand and grabbed the bottle of water to hand to me. As I took it from him and untwisted the cap, he sat and watched me go through the motions of drinking it. Javier was making sure I got water in my system.
Part of me was hoping that it was because he cared about my well-being.
