I had no idea what direction my life was going in, but I was rolling with the punches.
Chapter 20
Faheem Banks
July, 2020
“If you don’t stop frowning after I drug myself out of the bed to be here for you, knowing how this baby got me sick as fuck.” Mixie stood in front of me with her arms folded across her chest.
She wasn’t lying when she said my seed had her fucked up. Mixie had morning sickness the whole fucking day. This last week she’d barely gotten out of bed. I’d made sure she’d ate. Most times, it was soup and crackers, but as long as she had something in her belly. We had her first appointment a couple days ago. Everything was good with her pregnancy. My seed was growing strong. We got to hear the heart beat, and that made my heart swell in pride. I still wasn’t finna get too excited until I had my seed in my arms.
Juniper was still on her good bullshit. She wasn’t really fucking with a nigga, and at this point, I was finna give her some space. I loved her ass more than I probably should have, but Iwasn’t finna kiss her ass. She wanted a nigga to herself, and I wanted to be able to give her that, but I couldn’t just say fuck Mixie, not with her carrying my seed. I felt like the first time when Mixie lost my seed, I wasn’t there enough. I didn’t really get how delicate being pregnant was. I thought the shit was easy, forreal. I had never seen a broad lose they baby. I really didn’t comprehend it. This time, I wanted to be there every step of the way. I wasn’t tryna carry the guilt of me not being there.
As much as I loved Juniper, I couldn’t put her over my seed. I was gonna play it cool with Juniper for a little. At least a nigga was finna try to. The girl had a way of getting under my skin like no other. I found myself missing her mean ass too. She hadn’t let me sleep in her room since the night I had Gee take her doorknob off. I ain’t care as long as she brought her ass home. She wasn’t talking to me either, but she texted me everyday to tell me she loved me. That was better than nothing with her petty ass. I didn’t know if she was finna show up today. Frankee was coming, so there was a good chance, but with Juniper, you never knew what you were gonna get. I prayed she wasn’t on no bullshit ‘cause I’d hate to show my ass in front of my parents.
My parents definitely did their big one with this one. Everything was on point, the mansion she rented was nice as fuck. My parents' crib was big enough to have the party, but Big Frank wasn’t going for a bunch of strangers knowing where he laid his head at. My mom had it decorated in green, white, and gold. She even had the water in the pools and jacuzzi dyed green. The buffet style BBQ food layout, an open bar, a weed table, the dj was on point, it was hella people here, and the vibe was on point. They had big ass pictures of me hung in different places. My mom was lowkey being petty since she said Mixie didn’t know how to throw a party, so she went above and beyond to show her. My mama hadn’t stopped giving me hell about the food taking so long to come out at my birthday dinner. I let Toitalk her shit, ‘cause she was right; that dinner Mixie threw was trash. Aside from the food, when it finally came out, was boring as fuck. How that was possible, I didn’t even understand.
In reality, a nigga should have been smiling, but I was in my fucking feelings. Juniper’s ass had a nigga all in my feelings, had me feeling like a little bitch. I hadn’t seen her evil self all day. She hadn’t even texted me her usual I love you. Her ass left at the ass crack of dawn and went over to Frankee’s house. The only reason I knew where she was, was ‘cause Frankee called me, and I saw her ass in the background while we were on FaceTime. Her ass kee- keeing on the phone sent a nigga. I played that shit off even though a nigga was annoyed as fuck. In my feelings, I blocked her dumb ass. If she wanted to play stupid games, I was with the shit today. Tryna get my head back in the right space, I focused on Mixie and my seed. Juniper wasn’t about to have me acting like a pussy whipped ass nigga. Fuck her big headed ass.
I spent my morning with Mixie. I kinda felt bad ‘cause I didn’t realize how much I hadn’t been spending with her until she spoke on it the night before. I guess when you wanted to see shit a certain way, you did. I told Mixie I would spend more time with her,and I had every intention to until I woke up. Mixie woke me up with some head; she wanted to show her love for me, and we fucked or tried to, but the sex was off. I had to fake like I nutted ‘cause I didn’t want her feeling some type of way today. I never had a problem with my dick, and Mixie’s pussy was straight, but I wasn’t into the shit. Mixie went all out this morning ‘cause she bought a nigga some “just because” gifts too.
I didn’t want to be ungrateful, but all the shit she got me I really didn’t fuck with. She got shit that she wanted me to have, not shit I liked. Most of the shit she got was for her to flaunt that she was with a nigga. Mixie cared too much what other bitches thought about our relationship. The shit was childish as fuck. I was a low key nigga who didn’t give a fuck what others thoughtof me. Mixie knew that too, but that didn’t stop her from trying to make bitches jealous.
The clothes she got me weren’t shit I’d ever wear, she always wanted a nigga to dress like a preppy white nigga. The sho's she got looked like they came out of the Sketcher store. I thought she got them as a joke, but she was dead ass, claiming she didn’t want a nigga to be in pain from standing on my feet too long. Imagine that, me in some fucking Sketchers tryna run down on a nigga. Then she tried the fuck outta me getting me a shirt with her face on it saying mom-to-be and she got a shirt with my face on it saying dad-to-be and thought we was finna wear them today. She wanted to use this party to tell everyone about her pregnancy. I cut that shit short. Not only ‘cause I hadn’t told Juniper, but she was only a little over four months. She wasn’t outta the danger zone yet. Since she already had one miscarriage around this point, I wanted to wait until she was further along before we started telling people.
Mixie pouted about it, but once she saw there was no changing my mind, she let it go when I agreed to wear the matching swim suits she got for us to wear. I fucked with the green Gucci logo swim trunks and her matching monokini, that was what Mixie called it. The shit looked like a one piece bathing suit with cut outs on the sides. After a blunt and a shot, I was starting to get in the mood to celebrate.
Juniper’s stupid ass had fucked my day up, and she wasn’t nowhere around me. Thinking about her still entertaining other niggas had me hotter than fish grease. When I saw her, I was fuckin’ her whorish ass up. I didn’t get why she wanted to stir the fucking pot when shit between us had been good. It wasn’t like I lied to her about anything. She knew about Mixie from the jump. I always told her about where I stood with Mixie. It was no secret I didn’t plan on not fucking with Mixie. I did pull back when my feelings for Juniper got deeper, but I still cared for Mixie. She’dbeen there for a nigga in ways most wouldn’t, and now she was carrying a nigga’s seed. I wasn’t finna abandon Mixie now, and even if I did decide to leave Mixie, it wouldn’t be while she was pregnant. I didn’t need her stressing out and losing my seed. If Juniper couldn’t chill until then, I didn’t know what to tell her.
“My bad, Mixie,” I said, giving her a quick peck on the lips. “I appreciate you bein’ here with me.”
Mixie wrapped her arms around my neck looking up at me smiling as she said, “Anything to make you happy daddy.”
“Oh, yeah?” I gave her a knowing smirk. “You gettin’ in the pool with me?” I asked, just to fuck with her knowing she wasn’t finna get her hair wet.
“Now you know better. Go get ya little ho to get wet with. Let yer walk around looking like a wet dog,” Mixie snickered, rolling her eyes at me. “Speaking of her, you know what else I was thinking?” Mixie purred at me, licking her lips.
“Tell me,” I said while palming her big ass that was barely contained in her bathing suit. Mixie had always been thick as fuck, and my seed was only making her thicker. She had the type of body that bitches paid money for. The only thing on Mixie that wasn’t natural was her flat stomach. She used to have a small gut that she always complained about. After she got outta jail she asked if I’d pay for her to get a tummy tuck and lipo. I was with it, and now my bitch was badder than ever. Mixie already told me she wanted a mommy makeover as her push gift. Whatever brought my seed into this world healthy, I was for.
“I was thinking…” Mixie said as she ran her fingers up and down my chest sensually. “Since we’re still celebrating your birthday, I had another gift in mind. We can make it an extra special gift because you deserve nothing but the best. Ya’ know, if ya girl is down, you can have the both of us to end your night off right.” Biting her lips sensually, Mixie looked at me like she wanted to fuck me right now.
“I hear you, sexy.” A nigga didn’t have the heart to tell her that shit would never happen.
Juniper wasn’t with that shit. She probably cuss a nigga out if he even looked like he was finna ask some shit like that. I can’t even lie like I wanted that either. As good as it sounded, I didn't want to have a threesome with Mixie and Juniper. Not the way shit went this morning and the way I was when I fucked Juniper. Mixie wouldn’t be able to handle that.
“Just let me know, baby, I can get everything set up once we get home.” Mixie winked at me, then pranced over to the beach chair sitting down.
“Hey, baby.” I heard my mom’s voice as her and my dad made their way into the cabana my parents had for me. It was on a raised platform, green curtains lined the sides. If I wanted to close them, I could. At the moment, they were open, giving me a full view of the party going on around me.
“Hey, Ma,” I said, giving my mom a hug. “Sup.” I nodded at my dad. We still weren’t talking like that, the shit was weird.
“Toi, do me a favor and take Mixie to grab us some drinks while Faheem and I talk,” my dad told my mom, which meant he wanted to talk without them being present. Listening, my mom did what she was told, waving Mixie over to follow her out of the cabana.
My dad watched them leave, and once he felt they were far enough, he turned to me with a blank expression as he started speaking. “How long do you plan to be distant?”
“Shit, how long you plan on keeping the truth from me?” I shot back at him.
“I don’t look at it as keeping the truth from you. I know certain things, and they have to be handled delicately. Once everything is… safe, I can reveal everything that is going on. Trust me, son, it’s for your best, the less you know.”
