Everyone giggles. And I smile at my friends.
“Thanks, ladies. I appreciate your advice,” I say as I stand and head toward the guesthouse.
“Go get him, tiger,” Cam says loudly.
And for the first time in a long time, I think I’m going to be bold and admit my feelings to a man, a man I already absolutely adore. I just hope he feels the same way, or this will be hella awkward. But what’s that saying? Oh yeah, carpe diem.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Hutch
I walk straight into the cottage, bypassing the pool area where I can hear my drunk friends hooting and hollering on about “getting some.” Does everyone know what I’m about to do?
I shake my head as I slide the back door open and walk inside to find Jocelyn sitting on the sofa. Her legs are tucked under her. Her hair is pulled up, but a few loose curls hang down, framing her face. The dim lamp provides a golden hue to the room. Her sun-kissed cheeks are pink, and I can just see the start of some freckles. She’s still wearing the sundress from earlier, and my gaze drops to her cleavage. Fuck. She’s so perfect.
She looks up at me, and everything else in the world disappears as we lock gazes.
“Hey,” she finally says, breaking my trance.
“Hey,” I reply as I take a few steps toward the sofa. I sink down on the cushion and turn to face her. “Can we talk?”
Her lips start to turn down, and I quickly take her hands in mine. Her brows rise.
“I need to tell you something,” I say as butterflies dance in my belly.
Now her lips are twitching at the corners as if she’s fighting a smile. “Same,” she replies.
“You go first,” I insist. What I want to talk about is heavy shit, and we need time to talk about it.
She bites her lip and shakes her head. “No, you go first.”
Well, fuck.
“OK,” I say slowly as I rub the back of her hand with my thumb as if she’s some sort of emotional support person. Well, I mean, she kind of is.
“You’re one of my best friends,” I start, and I see her smile falter a little, and I begin to question how I’m going to do this. “What if…I…” I pause as I choose my words more carefully. “Have you ever thought about us being more than friends?” I ask, searching her eyes for answers before she opens her mouth to speak.
“Have you?” she asks.
I watch her gaze drop to my Adam’s apple, knowing even under my beard she must see it bob as I swallow hard. Here goes nothing.
“Yes,” I whisper.
Her eyes widen. “Same,” she replies.
I lick my lips as my gaze roams from hers to her breasts that heave beneath the fabric of her dress. A dress that I very much want to peel off her right now. It’s been months since I was with someone because this gorgeous creature in front of me has been all I can think about.
Neither of us speaks for a minute as we both process what we’ve just said.
“But,” she starts, and my heart sinks a little. Here it comes. With my ex, it was, but you won’t be able to give us the life we dreamed of. With other women I dated, it was, but you don’t party with your former teammates anymore? Or I expected you to be more alpha, not some cinnamon roll. Which I honestly didn’t understand until Roxy invited the guys to make a men’s book club at her romance bookstore.
“But what?” I ask, sounding more defensive than I want to admit. Her eyes widen again. Perhaps she’s surprised by my hurt.
She reaches up and strokes my cheek. I lean into her touch, needing it, needing her.
“But what if it doesn’t work? What if we…you know, and then it’s all awkward and then we can’t be friends,” she says in a rush that sounds panicked.
I give her a sad smile. “Then, maybe we don’t give this a shot.”
