Beau sat back once more with a small sigh. But there was no venom in it. Out of anyone in town, Beau understood most what the weight of expectation felt like. He and Lucas were a match made in heaven. My life, however, was not so magical.
“I know,” he said quietly. “And I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important to us. To me.” He fidgeted with his hat some more, his blue eyes meeting mine with an earnestness that made my chest tight. “You’ve been a good friend, Marcus. one of the few people in this town who didn’t treat me different when Lucas came into my life. That means somethin’.”
I swallowed hard, feeling the weight of his words settle over me like a heavy blanket. He was right, of course. I’d never treated Beau any differently after Lucas showed up. How could I? I understood what it was like to hide who you really were, to keep that part of yourself locked away where no one could see it.
“Besides,” Beau added. “It’s more of an honorary position, anyway. We’ll have to get married by a judge or a pastor to make it official thanks to state law.”
I let out a deep sigh. “When’s the wedding?” I heard myself ask.
“Late April. The twenty-ninth.” Beau’s face lit up with hope. “You don’t have to decide right now. Think about it, talk it over with yourself. But it would mean the world to both of us if you’d say yes.”
I nodded slowly, my mind already racing through the implications. Standing up in front of the whole town—because damn near everyone would come to see the Turner boy get married—and officiating a ceremony between two men. It would be a statement, whether I wanted it to be or not. People would talk. They’d wonder. They’d speculate about why the sheriff was so comfortable with it all.
And some of them might figure it out.
“I’ll think about it,” I said finally. “Give me a few days?”
“Take all the time you need.” Beau stood, placing his hat back on his head with a practiced motion. “We’ve still got a month to figure things out. Lucas’s friend Xavier just got into town yesterday to start plannin’ everything. You’ll probably meet him soon enough. He’s stayin’ out at the ranch.”
I’d heard about Xavier. The whole town had been buzzing about the wedding planner from New York City who was coming to orchestrate the Turner wedding. Apparently, he could turn heads, whatever that meant, though I hadn’t heard much beyond that.
“I’m sure I will,” I said, standing to walk Beau to the door. “Give Lucas my best.”
“Will do.” Beau paused at the threshold, turning back to look at me. “Marcus? I meant what I said. This town is changin’. You aren’t as alone as you think, you know?”
“I’m not sure what you mean,” I said automatically, hearing myself deny his implications. “But I’ll let you know what I decide.”
Beau’s expression shifted, but he nodded and placed his hat back on his head. “Thanks buddy. I’ll talk to ya later.”
I sat still, carefully guarding my expression until I heard the door close behind Beau. Once again, I was alone in my office, nothing but the thoughts buzzing around in my head to keep me company.
I stared at the closed door for a long moment, then dropped my head into my hands with a groan.
Of course Beau would ask me to officiate. Of course he’d do it in that earnest, heartfelt way that made it damn near impossible to say no. And of course he’d see right through me, mention that I wasn’t as alone as I thought. Like he knew. Like he could tell.
Maybe he could. Beau had always been perceptive, even as kids. He’d been the one to notice when I was struggling in algebra back in high school, the one who’d offered to study with me without making a big deal about it. And now he was offering me something else—a chance to be visible, to stand up in front of the town and show where I stood on things that mattered.
I just wasn’t sure I was ready for that.
Now, I wasn’t completely in denial. I knew what I was. I’d known since I was thirteen years old. And I also knew, much younger than that, that being gay was one of the biggest sins a man could commit in rural Texas. So, I did everything I could to hide it.
That’s why I took my quarterly long weekend to Austin and had as much sex as possible. There was a bathhouse there with dim lighting, lots of men, and no names exchanged. A weekend there was enough to get it out of my system so I could come back to Sagebrush and continue to honor my family’s good name. And the last thing I wanted to do was tarnish a reputation built over three generations of Sagebrush sheriffs.
My phone buzzed on the desk, pulling me from my spiraling thoughts. I glanced at the screen. It was just a notification abouta noise complaint on the edge of town. Mrs. Henderson’s dog again, probably. I’d deal with it later.
I stood and walked to the window, looking out at the quiet street. A couple of trucks were parked outside Dolly’s Diner, and I could see old Frank Hancock sitting on the bench outside the hardware store, probably waiting for someone to chat with. This was my town. These were my people. And I’d spent my entire adult life making sure they were safe, making sure they trusted me to do the job my father and grandfather had done before me.
But what Beau was asking me to do... it wasn’t just about officiating a wedding. It was about taking a stand, about being visible in a way I’d never allowed myself to be.
I thought about those weekends in Austin, about the anonymous encounters in dark rooms where nobody knew my name or my title. Where I could just be myself for a few hours before driving back to Sagebrush and locking that part of me away again. It worked. It had worked for years.
Except lately, it hadn’t been working as well as it used to. Lately, I’d been feeling the weight of it more—the hiding, the pretending, the careful distance I kept from everyone in town. Seeing all those happy guys down at Dolly’s, singing karaoke and living free and proud… it made the cage I’d built for myself seem smaller and smaller.
I rubbed my face with both hands, feeling the stubble on my jaw. I needed a shave. I needed a lot of things, actually, but a shave was at least manageable.
The phone buzzed again. This time it was Dolly.
“Sheriff? You gonna come deal with this situation or what?” Her voice crackled through the speaker.
