Without saying another word, Noah poured himself a cup of coffee, folded an arm over his chest, and leaned his ass against the counter. His dark, heavy-lidded eyes fixed on Kaj’s with an intensity that made him squirm. However, the drummer couldn’t look away. It was like Noah was a sticky spider web and he was the stupid insect that flew right into it, getting trapped.
A moment of silence stretched between them, filled only with the low hum of the bus engine and the incoherent noise inside Kaj’s head as they veered down a street. He was hypnotized… and fuckingdoomed.
Stumbling into the lounge with his pajamas all twisted, Aksel broke the tension lingering in the air. “Coffee,” he grumbled, making grabby hands at the pot.
Kaj chuckled, relieved that someone else was in the room. “Rough night?”
“Try sleeping with Xander snoring right below you. I swear, it’s like sharing a bunk with a sick rhino.”
As if summoned, the bassist appeared in the doorway. “Morning, sunshine,” he said, ruffling Aksel’s hair as he passed.
Aksel narrowed his eyes at him. “You fucking cave bear.”
Since the entire crew didn’t fit in one bus, they’d rented three and split up between them. Theirs had eight condo-style bunks. Hilde, Aksel, Noah, and Kaj claimed the top ones, while the heavy sleepers—Xander, Niels, Lars, and Haral (the other two musicians’ assistants)—who didn’t mind the rumble of the road being a little closer, took the bottom ones. That arrangement left the bassist sleeping under Aksel.
“Ever heard of earplugs?” Xander retorted.
“I was too tired last night to think about that.”
“Then, that’s ayouproblem.”
“You are the problem. Seriously, how is it that you don’t choke and die snoring like that?”
“You’re so exaggerating.” Xander rolled his eyes while pouring himself some coffee.
“Thank fuck we’re sleeping at a hotel tonight.”
As they continued their morning banter that happened nearly every damn day when they slept on a bus, Niels walked out of the front lounge, followed by their assistants.
That explains the coffee smell from before, Kaj thought when he saw they were all dressed and wide awake.I’m notcompletelyinsane—yet.
“Alright,” the manager called out. “Time to get your shit together. We have a long day ahead of us.”
There was a flurry of activity as everyone scrambled to get ready. After peeing and quickly washing his face, Kaj changed his sweats for a pair of worn jeans and put on his favorite leather jacket, the familiar weight settling on his shoulders like armor. A minute later, the bus pulled up to the back of a massive arena that would be filled with thousands of screaming fans later that evening.
As they disembarked, Kaj breathed in the crisp spring air, letting it clear his head. Inside, however, it was organized chaos as Artificial Suicide’s team, other bands’ crews, and the venue staff rushed back and forth, making the day pass in a blur of preparations for the concert.
Under different circumstances, Kaj would be having fun. As exhausting as it was, touring was one of his favorite parts of working in the industry. Getting to see so many incredible places while doing what he loved the most, life on the road with this family of waywards, different cultures, languages, and hearts, all connected in the sacred, oneiric place that music created. A place suspended in time. A place where geographical boundaries and societal labels blurred. But with Noah being part of it all, what used to be an escape had become a constant emotional struggle. Wanting him only added to the deluge of pent-up frustrations.
After he’d adjusted his cymbals, Kaj started marking a medium tempo, allowing Giulia, his tech, to check on resonance. Doing this also gave Kaj time to get accustomed to the acoustics—how the kick drums reacted to their surroundings, how it all sounded in his in-ear monitors, and all that. Xander and Aksel were checking with their respective techs that their bass, guitar, and amps were working as they should, too. Meanwhile, Noah was in the middle of the stage with Emma, the merch manager… dancing. Well, if that move where you grabbed your ankle, put a hand behind your back, and then flicked both limbs back and forth could be called that.
Kaj was trying to avoid looking at him, yet his eyes kept flicking between his kit and the vocalist, annoying the shit out of him.
This familiar routine, equivalent to meditation for him, should have been relaxing. It wasn’t the first time Noah goofed around and gave them a ridiculous spectacle. Not to mention they all looked like they hadn’t showered or washed their clothes in ages—messy hair, crinkled hoodies, and three-day beards, or otherwise shaggy beards. Still, watching that man today was slowly frying Kaj’s nerves.
“Noah! Can you please focus? You’re ready to go.” Klaus asked, lifting his gaze from his laptop screen where he was making the usual arrangements. “What are you even doing?” Klaus tried to be serious, but he couldn’t hold the laughter back.
“Funky chicken!” Noah said as he continued doing… whatever that was.
Val chuckled, recording the entire scene on his phone, shaking his head likethere’s no cure for what he has. It wasn’t like he was particularly interested in Noah being an uncoordinated dumbass, but they were doing a tour vlog to show their daily life, and Val loved capturing these moments, too. Some fans only cared about the music. Others lived for the fake persona bands created when they were up on the stage. However, there was a third group who thoroughly enjoyed what happened behind the scenes as they got to see the real them. It was great material to post, or so Val and their marketing manager said.
“Stop it!” Klaus cackled. “We need to be done in thirty minutes, or Oliver will kick our asses.”
“Fine, fine.” Noah grinned, his stance changing immediately as he grabbed the mic.
Kaj clicked his drumsticks, and soon the notes of a song from their last album flooded every particle in the air.
It was one of those in-your-face kinds of tracks, not only for the lyrics that talked about the innate yet irrational trait all humans have to judge and attack what is foreign to us, but because of the groovy, punishing death metal that abruptly changed, flowing into a slower tempo as the bass licks turned into a thick undertone and the guitar played on the offbeat of the rhythm.
