Chris sighed. “You bet.” He sat up again, rubbing his eyes. “What do I do with this? I’ve never been in this position. It’s so fucking unsettling.”
“Tell him,” she deadpanned.
“Yeah, right. That’s exactly what I was thinking.”
“Why not?”
“Because!”
“That’s not an answer.”
“Because there’s no way he’ll feel the same, and then everything will get awkward. And yeah, no. Fuck that.” Chris shook his head.
“Why are you assuming all this crap?”
“Seriously? Have you seen him?” He waved his hand around wildly.
“Yes, but I’ve also seenyou. You’re annoying as fuck, but you’re funny in your own twisted way. You’re smart, selfless, kindhearted, reliable, super interesting, even after all the years we’ve known each other, fucking talented, creative, and I’m gonna regret admitting this out loud, but you’re hot, Chris. Anyone would be lucky to have you falling for them. There, I said it.”
With his lips stretched into the stupidest grin, the guitarist shook his head, a new wave of confidence flaring up inside of him.
“I hate the way you underestimate yourself, dude.”
“I don’t. I’m aware of my strengths, but I definitely don’t see all the magic you see.”Selfless? I’m greedy as fuck.“You need to stop watching so many fantasy movies.”
“Shut up. You think that me,”—she touched her chest, batting her eyelashes with non-existent arrogance—“the most awesome person alive, would have a boring, egotistic, and noisy rat-boy for a best friend?”
He laughed. “You’re a fucking idiot.”
“Nothing new there.” She smiled. “So, what are you gonna do now that the holy spirit has illuminated you?”
Chris pressed his lips for a second, already knowing what he wanted to do. “I’m gonna tell him I want his tight ass to be only mine.”
“I like that!” Leah grinned as he got up and walked to his laptop to check the train schedules. “Go get your man.”
“Thanks, Jäger.”
“Always.”
24. History Is Silent
November17th,2017
Hamburg, Germany
Marc was looking at himselfin the mirror, almost done getting ready for his meet-up with Viktor, but he wasn’t feeling it. His heart was heavy and his chest tight.
Divided. A part of him was eager to get the closure he had been denied in the past, and even congratulate his ex for this big milestone in his career. The other couldn’t stop thinking about Chris. They’d been texting and calling each other all week, yet their conversation the day before had felt off. The way he had told him he wanted to talk… Marc hadn’t sensed any breaking-up vibes, but who the hell uses that expression if it’s something good?
Though maybe it was just his brain making up excuses because he was afraid. Afraid that he would follow his sorrows into a spiral of no return, letting Viktor and their memories confuse him.
He’d never been so desperate to hear someone say“I want you to be mine”, or simply show some real jealousy. He hated that shit. The sole idea of becoming a possession gave him the ick, but he would be anything for Chris. The guitarist might have given up on constantly fighting him for power when they were in bed, but he owned all of him.
“Are you kidding me?” Sophia said, inviting herself into the bathroom with him.
Privacy had never been a strong point in this house.
“What?”
