I nod my head and she gets up, stretching, and goes to the suite. I fold my hands in front of my face as if in prayer. In reality, I want to scream at the top of my lungs, but I hold it back.
I grab my phone and fire off a barrage of texts to Sarki, all in caps. Almost instantly, an audio message pings back. I press the phone to my ear, frantically scrambling to turn down the volume the second she starts screaming.
It feels like we’re eighteen all over again. I reply with a whispered voice note, as if I’m in the middle of committing a crime.
#18
“I feel like the color blue. You're packing up your stuff and talking like it's tough. And trying to tell me that it's time to go” Aerosmith
As I feel the water hitting my back, I’m half-convinced I’m dreaming—that at any second, Vanessa will throw open the curtains and tell me I’m late. It’s a teenage obsession, this craving for her.
But it’s also the fulfillment of a goddamn fantasy to have that asshole’s daughter in my bed, moaning my name. I thought having her once would be enough to scratch the itch, but I was dead wrong.
She’s like a drink in the hand of an alcoholic, a line of coke in front of an addict. The scent, the feeling of possession, the taste of her lips. Everything about Megan was designed to be an addiction, a pit of temptation I’d throw myself into without a second thought.
After my shower, dressed in the same top and pants from the night before, I open the door to the bedroom. Megan is lying face-down, her pale skin marked with bright red traces of the night we just shared. Only the curve of her backside is shielded by the white sheets.
She pulls on a hotel robe while we eat breakfast, chatting about the morning news as if we do this every day. At one point, she climbs onto my lap, and we keep talking. I’m actually enjoying this.
“During this trip, I'm stopping in Amsterdam. I'll be calling you,” I say, running my hands over her face before pulling her into a kiss. She smiles, and I can feel my own eyes lighting up. “I think I’m addicted to you.”
“Hmm. Tell me more about this addiction.” Our noses brush, and she tucks a stray lock of hair behind my ear.
“You have a beautiful smile. It’s incredible just talking to you...” I kiss her between every word. “Your body is a point of no return. I used to think you were just the ultimate conquest.”
“Am I just a goal to be reached?” She stares at me, her brow furrowing.
“You’re charming, brilliant, and fiercely independent. You’re not a goal, Megan. You’re a woman I want by my side. A woman who, incidentally, still hasn't answered my question.”
“Is there some hidden rule?” I make air quotes, and she smiles. “Only being with you when you're physically here?”
“None. I have no desire to control your life, Megan. If you ever feel the need to, I don't know, get married again, I’ll support you.”
“That works for me. So, what are you doing in Amsterdam?”
“Taking classes.”
“You don't look like someone who still needs a classroom, Kels.” She runs her hand up my thigh, her palm grazing the side of my hip as if she’s as addicted to my skin as I am to hers.
“Domination classes, Kitty. I’m learning the finer points of control.”
“Like Fifty Shades? That movie was garbage, Kelsey!” She laughs, hiding her face in the crook of my neck.
“That shouldn't even be a benchmark. But yes, it’s about BDSM. If I recall, you quite enjoyed 'relaxing' last night. You also seemed to enjoy it when I squeezed your nipple at the gym. It took some work to get you to surrender, but I get it.”
I bite her chin and trail kisses along her jawline. “You’re a judge; you control people's fates. Why wouldn't you want to control how you’re fucked? But just between us...”
“I’m still waiting to see where you're going with this. Go on...” She arches an eyebrow.
“I’m asking you to try and relax more. In bed, I’m the one in charge. You obey. Do you understand?”
“I’m not sure I do, but I promise to practice.” Her phone vibrates, and her expression shifts instantly from peaceful to irritated.
“We’ll practice, even from a distance. But you have to trust me.” I tap my thigh twice. “I have to head out, and I know you have a meeting. I’ll see you in DC. In the meantime... do your research.”
I hold her chin, sealing our lips together one last time.
“See you there. Thanks for last night,” she says.
