“Go away, I’m almost done.” I rinsed the lather from my body and peeked out of the curtain. He was gone. Drying off and dressing took several minutes since I couldn’t even put underwear on quickly. Then, I was on my way downstairs, with a towel on my head, to find him.
He stood in the kitchen, slicing a tomato. The fixings for a salad sat on the counter in front of him. He tilted his head as I walked in. “We didn’t have tomatoes on Galdiart. Our fruits and vegetables were very different from these, but no less delicious.” He dropped the tomatoes in a bowl and grabbed a cucumber, peeling it in stripes. “I’ve found similar veggies to almost everything I can think of from home, but nothing comes close from my world to a tomato.”
Popping a piece of tomato in his mouth, he finished peeling the cucumber and began slicing it into the bowl. “I was thinking about bringing some seeds from Galdiart and trying to plant them in your garden. We might be able to get something to grow.”
“What’s up with you, Axo?” He was acting weird.
His hand stilled over the cucumber, then he moved on to peeling a carrot. “Nothing. Why would you ask that?”
“Come off it, Axoular. You’re rambling like you’re nervous. What’s going on?”
He ignored me, finished peeling the carrot, and then sliced it. I let him contemplate his words. I’d learned enough about his personality over the months we’d lived under the same roof to know he’d talk when he was ready.
“I’ve been having some feelings,” he finally said.
“Oh?” I wondered if he was missing Minda.
“Yes. For you.”
My jaw dropped. I’d been having a few feelings myself, but had mostly attributed them to sex deprivation. I hadn’t given them any real thought. I said nothing and he continued his chopping. He chopped an onion, a few sweet peppers, and was ripping the lettuce before I finally spoke.
“I have as well.”Well, the cat is out of the bag now. Nothing left but to own up to Elias and Anthony.
He jerked around and stared at me. “I want to be in your life. And I don’t want to be your friend, or buddy as you say.”
“I don’t know what I want, Axo. I do know I want something more with you. But nothing, absolutely nothing, can be done until I discuss it with Anthony and Elias.”
He twirled and held his hands up, as if in surrender. “I agree completely. I would never betray their friendship that way.” He dropped his hands and hung his head before turning back to his salad prep. “I already feel as though I’ve betrayed them by admitting this to you.”
“As long as we go to them first thing in the morning with the information, it isn’t a betrayal.”
Nodding his head, he placed the bowl of salad on the table in front of me before going for condiments.
I dished myself out a generous portion. “When did you realize your feelings?”
“While you were showering.” I laughed at his honesty. “No, I’ve had the urges for a couple of months, but I think—what’s the word for doing something without realizing it?”
“Subconscious.”
“Okay. I think subconscious I was burying my feelings and attractions because of the potential explosion it could cause.”
“Subconsciously,” I quietly corrected.
He shrugged. “You know what I mean.”
I nodded and ate to give me a reason to think instead of talking. We finished eating in an awkward silence before cleaning up the mess and putting the leftover salad in the fridge.
I checked the time. Four in the morning.Might as well just stay up.
Wasting time with Axoular was usually easy. We’d end up playing cards, or a board game, or zoning out on TV. He liked learning new words from television shows and movies. “This is awkward,” I said, after we found yet another movie on in the wee hours of the morning that was just shy of porn.
I was uncomfortable, turned on, and not allowed to have the forbidden fruit until I cleared it with my husbands, though I had a sneaking suspicion they’d be okay with it. Axoular shifted in his seat several times, and I suspected he was in the same predicament I was. Horny and no relief in sight. No way I was going to go upstairs and use my husbands to relieve myself after getting turned on by another man. I wasn’t that bad of a person—though to be honest, the thought had crossed my mind.
You’ll live, Riley. Keep it in your pants.I stared at his pants, curious what was under his jeans.Screw it, you’re a horrible person. Go upstairs and find something to do.
“I’m going to go read,” I said as I stood. “Feel free to sleep in the spare bedroom if you need a nap. Or go swim, or whatever you want.”
He nodded, expression unreadable, as I exited the room.
