“Crush?” I ask.
“Sure. I mean, don’t most relationships start with a crush?” He pokes me in the chestwith his elbow. “Don’t tell me you’ve never had a crush on anyone.”
Sure I have, but I’m not thinking about that now. I’m more focused on what he just told me. Artemis has a crush on me? Or she had? Is that why she wanted to go to the dance with me? Why her brotherpaidme to take her?
I shut my eyes. No. I won’t let those thoughts consume me. Because the more I think about it, the more my resolve to push everyone away will crumble. And then what would happen? I’d get hurt again. I’d hurt those around me.
“Dude, you okay?” Jason asks with a lifted brow. “You’re tense.”
“Fine.” It’s far from the truth, but he doesn’t need to know all the crap I’ve been through. No one needs to know. I stand. “I’ve got to get back inside.”
“Okay, see ya.”
I don’t return to the school building. I walk to the center of the soccer field and let the memories wash over me. I know I’m just torturing myself, but right now I want to remember them, remember how things used to be. Remember that once upon a time, I was a normal kid with a normal family.
Dropping down, I take out my phone and continue the drawing I started this morning. Like usual, I have no idea what it’ll turn out to be, but that’s the interesting part.
I let myself get lost in the colors. Can picture myself showing it to my parents, just like I’ve done all my life.
I don’t pay attention when the bell rings. And by the time I realize lunch is over, I’m late to science.
The teacher excuses me, maybe because he knows I’m the guy with the dead parents. Bet my grandmother told the entire faculty to cut me some slack.
I catch Artemis watching me as I head down the rows and find my seat at the back of the room. I can’t stop my thoughts from reminding me that this girl possibly has a crush on me. But I need to pretend it’s not true, or else I won’t be able to forget about it. And I need to forget. It’s the only way to keep my distance from her.
Yeah we have that school project, but I’m trying to see it as just as assignment and nothing more.
“I know you hate me.”Artemis’s words bounce around in my head. I don’t hate her. She has no idea how alive I felt when we danced together. And honestly, if things were different, I would have liked to hang out with her more, get to know her better. She’snice and fun, can make anyone laugh.
But things are the way they are and I need to close myself off.
***
I follow Artemis up the stairs to her house. No, mansion. The place is huge, ten times the size of my grandma’s house. It sits in the middle of town, letting everyone know Mr. West is in charge, which he is, I guess. Being mayor of town and all. From what I can tell, the people love him and are happy citizens. Grandma told me the festival was a success, and all her cookies were snatched up within two minutes.
It was a mistake to go, though I’d be lying to myself if I said I didn’t enjoy it. Up until a certain point.
“Why are you standing there?” Artemis knocks me out of my thoughts. She widens the door. “You’re not nervous to meet my parents, are you?”
“I don’t get nervous,” I say as I move past her into the building. I’m hit with a large foyer, two staircases on opposite ends of the room, and the shiniest furniture I have ever seen in my life.
I knew the Wests were rich when Jason pulled out all that money, but I’ve never seen so much wealth up close. For some reason, I feel like a commoner in my simple shirt and torn jeans. I don’t try to look good anymore, not like I used to. What’s the point?
“Let’s go to my room,” Artemis says, turning toward one of the staircases. I follow her and when we’re nearly at the top, a man meets us there. Her dad.
His eyes curiously move from his daughter to me. “Good afternoon, sweetheart. Who’s your friend?”
Artemis gestures toward me. “Ryan Rogers. We have a school project.”
Her dad smiles pleasantly at me, holding out a hand for a shake. “It’s nice to meet you, Ryan. You’re Lauren’s grandson, aren’t you?”
I nod, accepting his hand. “Nice to meet you, too.”
He scans me from top to bottom. I’m not sure if he likes what he sees. Maybe someone as messed up as me isn’t welcome in this fancy house.
“I haven’t had the chance to welcome you to River Spring,” Mr. West goes on. His expression turns from pleasant to sympathetic, like he’s not sure how to act around me. Of course he knows about my parents. I wonder if he told Artemis.
“You remember the rules, Artemis. No boys allowed in your room.”
