“You guys looked like such idiots,” Tyler says.
Jess picks up a piece of snow and throws it at him. He catches it and lobs it back. I reach up and bat it away before it hits her.
“You ready to ski this?” I latch my foot into my bindings.
“Ready to kick your butts,” she laughs. “Anytime.” She steps into her skis and starts down the hill while Ty and I are still getting our boards on.
She’s waiting for me by the lift when I reach the bottom. She’s leaning against the fence looking smug. “Told you I’d kick your butt.”
“You cheated. You shoved me down at the top and then took off before I had the chance to put my board on.”
“It was you, knuckle-dragger, who got your board caught under my skis.” I love to see her smile when she says that. She looks like the old Jess.
“Yeah, whatever,” I say.
“So what happened to Ty?”
“He headed to the terrain park.” I wonder how she’s going to feel about skiing with just me.
“You can go with him. I don’t mind skiing alone.”
“I’ll stick with you for a while if you don’t mind. I'm a little old for the terrain park.” I follow as she slides into the back of the line.
“You're not that old. You’re just worried that I’m going to kill myself or someone else.”
“The thought occurred to me. You’re a maniac on skis.”
She shakes her head, but doesn’t answer. When we get on the lift, I sit near the middle, close to her. I’m waiting for her to turn her music back on, but she doesn’t. She leans back and looks away from me.
A shadow moves across her face. I stretch my arm over the back of the chair and touch her shoulder. “You want to talk about it?”
She shakes her head and closes her eyes. “It’s hard to be here. We spent a lot of time on this hill when we were kids. There are just a lot of reminders.” I slide closer and put my arm around her shoulders. She doesn’t say anything else, but she doesn’t move away either.
When we get to the top, she says. “There’s somewhere I need to go. I'll see you at the bottom.”
“I’m going with you.”
She shakes her head and takes off her skis. I plant my board and follow her as she hikes up the mountain. She doesn’t stop me.
I don’t ask her where she’s going, even when she ducks under the out-of-bounds tape and goes into the woods. I catch up with her just as she reaches a little clearing. There are trees on one side and a breathtaking view of the mountains on the other. I don’t know what significance this place has for her. She’s struggling not to show how much she's hurting.
She takes her helmet and her goggles off. “I almost expected it to be the same.”
I don’t answer. I don’t think she’s talking to me.
She walks over to a tree and kneels down and drags her hand through the snow. She doesn’t move or speak for a long time.
I take a chance and get closer. I put a hand on her shoulder. “What is this place?”
She looks up like she just realized I followed her. “This is where Matt proposed to Kendra. For some reason, I thought it would be the same.” She closes her eyes and leans against the tree. “I keep looking for Matt. I keep thinking he’s got to be here somewhere.”
I kneel next to her in the snow. “Tell me about that day.”
She's quiet for a minute and then nods. “They made a table and chairs. And there were candles, and lights in the trees and champagne, and—” she stops, stands up, and crosses the clearing. A wreath decorated with white roses hangs in the lower branches of a tall pine.
She touches the wreath reverently.
I put my hand on her shoulder. “Did you bring this here?”
