I struggle to make sense of anything. “Michael,” I croak again. “Why are you here?”
“I was in town for my mom's birthday. I would have called, but I didn't think you'd want to see me. I came as soon as I heard." He turns away, still gripping my hand.
As soon as I heard you were sick. I want him to finish that way. I don’t want to believe there’s another reason for him to be here. It’s just a nightmare.
He leans close to my face and strokes my hair. His eyes are wet.
“Please, what can I do for you? I only want to help.”
I pull my hand from his and press my fists into my eyes. I want to shut him out, shut all of this out. I want the world to go dark again. I feel like I’m going to throw up again. This time I don’t think it’s physical.
“Kendra,” I say suddenly. “Find Kendra. I need to know if she’s okay.”
Michael covers my hand with his. “I’ll find her. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
He leaves. I close my eyes again, no tears. Why can’t I cry? Someone is coming in and out of my room—rummaging through my closet, through my drawers. I don’t know who it is. I don’t care. I can only focus on the pain and horrible emptiness in my chest. I drift away again.
I wake up to voices in my room. This time I’m not naïve enough to think everything is a dream. “Has she taken anything?” It’s a woman’s voice I don’t recognize.
Nichole answers, “I don’t think so. She threw up last night. She’s only been up once since then, when she got the phone call.”
A hand on my forehead. “She’s burning up. Get my thermometer. In my work bag.”
I open my eyes. My head pounds. Michael is kneeling beside my bed. “Did you find Kendra?”
“She’s already on her way home. I brought my sister, Karen, back with me. She’s a doctor.”
Karen takes my temperature. When she looks at the display, she shakes her head. “103.1,” She hands the thermometer to Nichole. They’re all hovering around my bed. “Have you taken anything for the fever, Jess?”
I shake my head.
“How do you feel?” She hesitates. “I mean physically.”
“Achy, hot, pretty horrible.”
“You have the flu. It’s been bad this year. The vaccine wasn’t a good match. You need to stay in bed, rest, get lots of fluids. You look dehydrated.”
I start to sit up. “I need to go home.”
Karen shakes her head. “Your family doesn’t need this right now. Get a few days of rest. Then, have someone drive you. I wouldn’t recommend your going now.”
I lie back down and press my hand into my face. How can I possibly stay here?
Michael takes my hand. “I’ll do whatever you want.”
I open my eyes and look into his, pleading. “I want to go home. Now.”
Karen shakes her head. “There’s nothing you can do now, Jess, nothing but make them sick. A couple of days.”
“No.” I moan and turn my face to the wall. Swallow. My throat aches; it’s sore too. When they’re all gone, I’ll drive myself. I have to be home.
Michael touches my face. “I’ll take you home.”
“Mike, you can’t,” Karen starts.
“I have to do something.” His voice is choked with tears. The sound makes my throat hurt more.
Karen sighs. “Okay. But I want her to take something to bring the fever down. Keep an eye on her temperature. If it goes any higher,you’d better take her to the ER.” She lowers her voice. “I don’t recommend this for either of you, but I know I can’t change your mind.”
