God, I feel like a piece of shit. I have done nothing but ignore him, acting like I was better than him, when he’s done nothing but keep trying. Fuck if that doesn’t make me want him even more.
As I brush my teeth and try to do something with my bird’s nest of tangled hair, I admit to myself there’s something incredibly sexy about him wanting to take things slow.He’s in control here.And it’s kind of…sweet? Grilled Cheesus, I have never donesweetwith any guy. I’ve only dated complete assholes who would find out I was a pilot and immediately ask if I had joined the Mile High Club. I roll my eyes.Sooriginal.
But not Jordan.
This is nothing like any other relationship I’ve been in before.Maybe that’s the point?Shit…Kennedy, you aren’tina relationship with him. I slam my hairbrush on the counter, reminding myself that the relationship part is fake. He wouldn’t even want this to be real…would he?I’m jolted from my thoughts as a text comes through.
Jordan:
On my way back to your place! Be there in 15. Please check for talking bears.
Shit.I hurry to finish my make-up and find something to wear. I still don’t know where we’re going. He said casual is fine, but dear God, what do I wear? What says, ‘I like you, and I respect your boundaries, but also I want to rip your clothes off, tie you to my bed, and sit on your face?’Jeans?
I decided on some leggings and an oversized crewneck, fancying it up with a necklace and earrings and cute tennisshoes. I throw my hair in a quick pony and decide the elevated Sporty Spice look is fine for this non-date.
I finish getting ready and race downstairs, a strange feeling hitting my gut as I wait in the lobby. My stomach flips, and I can feel my heart beating in my throat.Am I…excited? What the hell is happening to me?
When we arrive at our destination, we walk into the building hand-in-hand. My pulse races and my eyes blink like they are trying to talk in Morse code. Jordan must sense my anxiety, squeezing my fingers gently.
“Are you okay? If you don’t want to come in, I get it. I know this is a lot.”
I can say with all honesty, this is the last place on earth I would have thought we would end up. The giant giraffe painted on the wall, the colorfully decorated elevator banks, and the cheerful music playing are a disheartening contrast to the mood of everyone walking by. All the bright and cheerful artwork is a distraction that will forever fall short. Walking through the lobby, there’s no laughter, only quiet whispers between parents and children. Some are here for a quick visit. Others are simply fighting to survive.
I swallow down my emotions. “No. I’m okay. I’m just…surprised. It’s really cool that you do this.”
He shrugs as we walk toward the visitors’ desk to check in. “Remember when I told you how I like to entertain the fans at the games? This is why. You never know what someone’s going through, and if there’s anything I can do to help them have a better day…I’ll do it.”
Now it’s my turn to squeeze his hand, choking back the tears threatening to fall at this caring and compassionate side of him. I loop my other hand around his arm as a wave of guilt makes my feet heavy for ever misjudging this man.
“Hi, Janet,” Jordan says as we approach the desk. “I brought a friend today…” He pauses as he flashes me his impossibly charming smile. “My girlfriend, actually. This is Kennedy.”
A wide smile spreads across Janet’s face, her eyes darting between the two of us.
“Well, I’ll be damned. You’ve never brought anyone with you, Bougie. Nice to meet you, Miss Kennedy. Here are your badges,” she says, handing us each a little sticker with our names, Floor Seven, and a word I never thought I’d have to read on it.
Oncology.
“Miss Kennedy, you snagged yourself a keeper. He’ll show you where to go. Oh, and welcome to Milwaukee Memorial Children’s Hospital.”
41
kennedy
We knock on the doorframe of room 706 and see a sweet, teenage girl wearing a Steel Riders pom-pom hat lying in a bed, hooked up to an IV pole, watching a show on an iPad.
“Hey, Kellsie, got time for a visitor?” Jordan says as we stand in the doorway.
Her sunken, tired eyes light up. “Jordan! I wasn’t sure you’d make it with the playoffs going on. Come in!”
He smiles as we enter the room. “Where’s your mom?”
“She went down to the cafeteria to get something to eat. She’ll be back soon,” she says as Jordan walks over to give her a hug. “Wait…oh my gosh!” Her excited squeal pierces the air. “Is this who I think it is? For real?”
He laughs and turns to me, waiving for me to come closer. “Kellsie, I’d like to introduce you to Kennedy, my girlfriend.”
I nervously walk to her bedside to shake her hand. “Nice to meet you, Kellsie. How do you know who I am?”
She scoffs. “I saw you two making out on the internet with the rest of the world.”
