“The leopard wasn’t from them. It was um…from…”
“Who was it from, Jordan?”
His eyes lock with mine. He runs his hand through the long waves of brown hair before finally whispering, “Me.”
37
jordan
It’s finally here. The moment my life ends. My stomach twists.Kennedy Kramer knows I’ve been sending her gifts. She’s staring at me with a hammer, still held over her head, ready to strike. Except now her eyes are dead on me.
“You?You sent this to me?” she says, slowly lowering the hammer to hold in front of her chest.
“Not the bear! Just Neil.” He glances around the room. “And the espresso maker. And the guitar. And some roses. And a few other things here and there…”
She tilts her head, tapping the weapon into the palm of her hand. “All of this was you? Even the poems?”
I drop my eyes to the floor, unable to hold her gaze to say one simple word. “Yes.”
“Jordan,” she says, her voice eerily calm. I can’t look up. I can’t face her disappointment.I just got her…I’m not ready to lose her.Her heels tap the floor, then another. “Look at me.”
I force my eyes up to see her still holding the hammer in her hands. Is she going to crack my skull open? Is this it?Fuck. At least I’ll go at the hands of the most beautiful woman to ever exist.
“Every one of these gifts came with a poem. Thesamepoem. ‘I see you in my dreams, in every sunlit sky; I see you in the morning when you barely pass me by. Like waves drawn to the shores, you’ve pulled me in with force. I’ll long for you until’…” her voice trails off as if she’s afraid to say the last line.
“I’ll long for you until the day when I am finally yours,” I finish it for her.
She drops her arm holding the hammer down to her side, a slight wave of relief washing over me. Not completely, because she’s still holding the damn thing, not that I think she would hurt me, but Ididjust admit to being her secret admirer.Andwe’re both getting texts from a random stalker guy.
I really fucked up.
She takes a deep breath, holding it in as if it will make this whole situation disappear.If only.
“Jordan…” she says, her voice still steady and composed.“I’m going to need you to explain.”
I let out the breath I have been holding.She’s going to let me explain. She’s not immediately kicking me out. My heart does a dance of relief, but quickly pauses.Is this just the calm before the storm?Fuck. My guts churn; we are already in the eye of the hurricane. The only way through this is to let the rest of the storm pass. “I promise I’ll explain and I’ll tell you anything and everything. But…could you just do me one quick favor?”
Her eyes narrow. “What in the world do you need me to do?”
“Maybe could you just like…put the hammer down? I’m still creeped out by demonic Paddington, and you holding a hammer while I’m confessing my sins isn’t helping.”
She shakes her head, huffing out a defeated laugh as she sets it down on the coffee table before flopping down on the couch. I sit down as well, but all the way on the other end.That hammer is still a little too close for comfort.
I swallow the lump in my throat, preparing to say what I have wanted, but also not wanted, to admit for so long. “When I started sending you gifts, I honestly had no plan of how I was going to tell you it was me. But never in a million years did I imagine it going like this.”
Her nose curls as she catches a glimpse of Neil. “Why were you sending me all this stuff?”
“Because…” I run my hand through my hair, hoping there is something magical in the product I used that will give me the strength to spit this out. “Because I like you. The first time I saw you, you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. The way your eyes sparkled all the way down the aisle. Your sexy as hell uniform.” A groan slips out before I can stop it. “Goddammit, Kennedy, you wear the hell out of that scarf.” Her scowl cracks as the corners of her lips tip up.If a half-smile through her anger is all I’m getting…I’ll take it.
“Every trip, I watched you smile and say goodbye to everyone as they stepped off the plane. You seemed so kind, goodhearted, and like you really cared about getting us all from place to place and being a part of the team. But…” my voice trails off, wondering if I should even continue. But I owe her the truth.It’s the least I can do now.“You treated everyone like that…except for me.”
A flicker of surprise crosses her face, her gaze dropping to the floor. “Jordan…I?—”
“Kennedy, it’s…this is all on me. Let me get this all out before we get into anything else. Please?” She nods, her eyes focused on the couch cushion. “All I wanted was to talk to you. To get to know you. But every time I walked by, you seemed put off. I thought, maybe, if I sent you some gifts, you’d realize I liked you and, maybe, I’d get the courage to…I don’t know…ask you out sometime.” I rub the back of my neck. “I was so scared you’d say no. And, somewhere deep inside, I decided silence wouldhurt less than rejection. Call me crazy, but there’s just something about you. I felt it the minute I saw you, like some sort of magnet was pulling me toward my other half. I don’t have much experience with relationships, but I know my heart. It lost its will to find love a while back. It hasn’t wanted to beat for anyone. Ever. Until you.”
Her lips tighten, her cheeks flush. Is she embarrassed I’m telling her this? Is she going to turn me down?Focus, Jordan. You have to get this off your chest.
“I was…I was hurt before by someone I dated. Hurt is actually an understatement. I trusted someone who only wanted me for my money. But the fact that you wanted nothing to do with me? I felt like you didn’t give a shit about my money.”
